This is a guide for Anarchists and can be funny for non-believers and 12
and 13 year old runts, and can be a lexicon of deadly knowledge for True
Anarchists... Serious damage is intended to be dealt here. Do not try this
stuff unless you want to do a lot of serious Anarchy.
[Simulation]
Asshole - 'Listen, you little teenager punk shit, shut the fuck up, or I'll
knock you down!'
Anarchist - 'O.K.....You can't say I didn't warn you. You don't know my true
power...' (soooo casually)
Asshole - 'Well, er, what do you mean? Anarchist - '<demoniac grin>'
As you can see, the Anarchist knows something that this asshole doesn't...
Contained within is information only recently released by The Inner Circle of
312 & 215 Anarchists.
[Operation Fuckup]
Geta wheel barrel or two.Fill with gasoline. Fill with gasoline. Get 16 rolls
of toilet paper, unroll & drench in the gasoline. Rip to shreds in gasoline.
Get asbestos gloves. Light a flare (to be punk), grab glob of saturated toilet
paper (you can ignite the glob or not). Throw either flaming or dripping glob
into:
any window (picture is the best)
front doors
rough grain siding
and best of all, brick walls.
First of all, this bitch is near impossible to get off once dried, and is a
terror to people inside when lit! After this... during the night, get a pickup
truck, a few wheel-barrels, and a dozen friends with shovels. The pickup can be
used only for transporting people and equipment, or doing that, and carting all
the dirt. When it gets around 12:00 (after the loser goes beddie - bye), dig a
gargantuan hole in his front yard until about 3:00. You can either assign three
or four of your friends to cart the dirt ten miles away in the pickup-bed, or
bury his front door in 15' of dirt! After that is done, get three or four
buckets of tar, and coat his windows. You can make an added twist by igniting
the tar when you are all done and ready to run! That is if the lose has a
house. If he lives inside an apartment building, you must direct the attack
more toward his car, and front door. I usually start out when he goes to
work...I find out what his cheap car looks like, and memorize it for future
abuse...It is always fun to paint his front door (apt.) hot pink with purple
polka-dots, and off-neon colors in diagonal stripes. You can also pound a few
hundred or so four inch nails into his front door (this looks like somebody
really doesn't like you from the inside). Another great is to fill his keyhole
with liquid steel so that after the bastard closes his door - the only way to
get back in is to break it down. If you can spare it, leave him an axe - that
is, implanted three inches into, and through the door! Now, this next one is
difficult, but one of the best! Get a piece of wood siding that will more than
cover his front door completely. Nail two by fours on the edges of the siding
(all except the bottom) so you have a barge - like contraption. Make a hole at
the top that will be large enough for a cement slide. Mix about six or seven
LARGE bags of QUICK drying cement. Use the cement slide to fill the antichamber
created by the 'barge' that is around his door. Use more two by fours to brace
your little cement-filled barge, and let the little gem dry. When it is, remove
the 'barge' so only a stone monolith remains that covers his door. Use any
remaining cement to make a base around this so he can't just push it over.When
I did this, he called the fire department, and they thought he meant wood, so
they brought axes. I watched with a few dozen or so other tenants, and laughed
my damn ass off! This is only his door!After he parks his car for the night,
the fun really begins...I start out by opening up the car by jamming a very
thin, but loack - inside and out! Then proceed to put orange-juice syrup all
over the seats, so after he gets through all the other shit that you do, he
will have the stickiest seats in the world. You can then get a few Sunday
papers, and crack one of the windows about four inches. Lightly crumple the
papers, and continue to completely fill the inside of his car with the
newspapers. A copy of the Sunday New York Times will nicely fill a Volkeswagon!
What is also quite amusing is to put his car on cinder blocks, slash his tires
at the top, and fill them with cement! Leave the cinder blocks there so that,
after he knocks the car off of them, he will get about 3 miles to the gallon
with those tires, and do 0 to 60 in about two minutes! It is even more
hilarious when he doesn't know why the hell why! Another is to open his hood,
and then run a few wires from the sparkplugs to the METAL body. The sure is one
HOT car when it is running! Now, I like to pour two pounds of sugar down his
gas tank. If this doesn't blow every gasket in his engine, it will do something
called 'carmelizing his engine'. This is when the extreme heat turns the sugar
to carmel, and you literally must completely take the engine out and apart, and
clean each and every individual part! Well, if this asshole does not get the
message, you had better start to get serious. If this guide was used properly &
as it was intended (no, not as kindling for the fire), this asshole will either
move far away, seek professional psychological help, commit suicide, or all of
the above!
Brought to you by The Cracksmith and Dave At Late Night BBS 817-485-7804 Atari
only.
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