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***                 ***                              ***                ***
**      "FUCK        **       P/H/A Presents...      **    "WE DON'T     **
*                     *                              *                    *
*                     *       The Art of Coning      *                    *
*        THA          *                              *      GIVE A        *
*                     *          Written by:         *                    *
*                     *          Dark Helmet         *                    *
*        POLICE!"     *       Special Thanx to:      *      PHUCK!"       *
**                   ** Phreakers/Hackers/Anarchists **                  **
***            -NWA ***         P/H/A Phile #3       ***           -PHA ***
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\            This phile writting on 03/28/90 about 3:00pm PST.            /
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DISCLAIMER:  If you get caught by the cops, I pity you!  You suck if you
             get caught by the cops.  I'm not responsible for a fuckin'
             thing you do with this fuckin' text phile, so do whatever the
             fuck you want with it.  Smoke it or whatever makes you happy.


INTRODUCTION:

     This method of destruction/phun/fucking something up, was first
conceived by myself, Doctor Dissector and Killer Korean.  We found it very
stimulating.  It gave us something to do on that Friday night when no one
was out.  It is especially useful against cops!  It can be used to
throughly mess someone's car up or just to make them swerve and eat shit on
the side of the road.  Now onto the preparation.

PREPARATION:

     This is a list of the things you will probably need to have a
successful coning adventure.

Car         - Preferably a FAST car, in case you need to get rid of a cop
              if the need arises.  Also, it should have a big back seat.
Phreaks     - 3 minimum, 4 maximum for best results.
Balls       - You'll need a little bit of courage to huck the fuckers.
Cones       - A nearby constuction site should supply ample amount of cones
              for your expedition.  I'll explain the 2 types later.
Knife       - To cut the reflectors off the cones.
Cassette    - With Mission: Impossible music on it.  Adds to the action.

These things are what you will need to pull this off right.  You WILL need
all of them except the Cassette is optional.
     There are 2 types of cones.  The first kind (Fig. 1) are good if you
just want to mess around.  They are small, compact, and you can get about
20 in a car.  The second type (Fig. 2) are good for really fucking someone
up.  These can really cause someone to eat shit or fly off a cliff or
something awesome like that.  The second type is used for optimal results.

            Fig. 1                              Fig. 2

                                                ____
                                                |  |
                                                |##|
                                                |  |
                                                |##|
                                                |  |
               _                                |  |
              / \                               |  |
             /   \                              |  |
            /     \                             |  |
           /       \                            |  |
          /         \                           |  |
        ===============                     ============

  ## = Reflector

PROCEDURE:

     After you have found your supply of cones, grab as many as you can.
Then find a very dark street with lots of curves on it.  A really good
street would be one that people drive fast on and is really dark all the
time.  Put the cone right in the dark, right on the curve, or just after
the curve.  After your trap is set, turn around and go back and park
somewhere dark where no one will suspect you of putting that cone there.
Turn off your lights (make sure you don't have your brake lights on either)
and wait for someone to go by.  DON'T take off as soon as you see someone
go by.  Wait until they are a little ways down the road.  Then take off
slowly and just follow them.  Watch them eat shit or swerve or whatever
they do.  Make sure you don't hit it yourself when you go by it.
     Plant a few somewhere and then go around and do something.  Then come
back later and see what you have done.  Check for skid marks.  See if the
cone came apart.  See if the cone is gone!  If you see any of those, your
mission was accomplished!
     Cops, the enemy, are the best to cone.  This will really get your
adrenalin flowing.  If you are being chased by a cop (for whatever reason,
speeding, reckless driving, whatever), cone him!  Make sure the cone you
throw out is the LAST cone you have, because if he doesn't see you throw it
and then he does pull you over, you don't have 6 cones in your car.  If you
are successful, he will hit the cone and either slow down for you to get
away, or eat shit and die.  Either one will work quite effectively.
     That's about all there is to it.  Just make sure you don't get caught,
because you will probably get arrested for having cones, stealing the
cones, and perhaps speeding, reckless driving, and anything else the pig
can make up.

CONCLUSION:

     Coning can be an excellent way to brighten up a boring Friday night.
Coning cops can prove most effective if you don't want another ticket, or
just don't want any at all.  In P/H/A's experiences we have found that the
second type of cones (Fig. 2) are the best ones to use.  They are big,
heavy and would do some mass damage if they were hit right.  The first type
of cone (Fig. 1) prove very effective against your friends or just to screw
around.  The big boys play with the second type though.  So, don't get
caught and have a blast!

    *-*-*-*-This phile was written by Dark Helmet on 03/28/90-*-*-*-*

CLOSING COMMENTS:

Greets to...cDc, NARC, CHiNA, ex-PPP members, and all coners out there.

HAHAHA to...the cop P/H/A coned a week ago, all the people that hit the
            others we planted that night, Wizdom (you lag dude), and all
            the lamerz that wish they had balls enough to cone someone.

P/H/A are...Doctor Dissector, Dark Helmet, Killer Korean, and Anonymous
            Anarchist.

P/H/A Nodes: Insidious Infuzion - P/H/A HQ - SysOp: Doctor Dissector
             Internal Stack III - P/H/A #2 - SysOp: Dark Helmet

(c)1990 by Dark Helmet & P/H/A, You may distribute this phile freely as
                                long as it is kept in it's original
                                un-altered form.
                                P/H/A Phile #3.


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