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The Journal of IceNET May 1994
ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Editor's Desk і
і The History Of IceNEWS Jim (1@1) і
і Comments From The M/E Deacon Blues (2@7653) і
і Letters To The Editors Louie (6@1) і
і і
і Feature Stories і
і Being A Sysop: A Female's Perspective Daydreamer (2@4501) і
і Life As An IceNET GC Dr Diversity (1@8400) і
і Let's Get Together: Starting BBS Events Louie (6@1) і
і і
і WWIV-Specific і
і Protecting WWIV Papa Bear (1@5079) і
і What's Wrong With WWIVMAIL/QWK? Ima Moron (1@9661) і
і і
і Software/Programming і
і Learning C - Part Four Daarkhan (1@7676) і
і Artificial Intelligence - Part One Louie (6@1) і
і і
і Lite Bytes і
і Isn't It Great Being A Sysop? Louhal (1@10) і
і How I Started BBSing - Part Two Louie (6@1) і
і The Adventures Of ModemMan - Part Four Jots (1@7850) і
і Deacon Blues (2@7653) і
і Word Search Puzzle Louhal (1@10) і
ГДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДґ
і IceNEWS Staff For May 1994 і
і і
і IceNEWS Editor-In-Chief - Jim 1@1 і
і IceNEWS Managing Editor - Deacon Blues 2@7653 і
і і
і IceNEWS Contributing Editors і
і Hardware - Will 1@6754 WWIV-Specific - Jack Ryan 1@4707 і
і Lite Bytes - Ima Moron 1@9661, Deacon Blues 2@7653 і
і і
і Editor-At-Large - Louie 6@1 і
і і
і IceNEWS Production - Spelunker 1@7653 і
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і IceNEWS is always seeking submissions from those who have і
і ideas for stories. If you have any ideas that you might і
і like to see published, contact any IceNEWS editor or і
і subscribe to IceNEWS Beat, subtype IceNEWS, host @1. і
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ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
ДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДЩ E D I T O R ' S D E S K АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і The History of IceNEWS і Jim (1@1)
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДБДДДДДДДДДД
About 1990, after seeing WWIVnews a few times, I wanted IceNET to have
it's own IceNEWS. At that time I asked IceNET's 1@12 (now called 'The Sysop',
but then he was known as Slotcar Freak) to take on the task of preparing the
first issue. He was to work with Geot, 1@14 (no longer in IceNET), and gather
articles from around the network. With this mission at hand, what he finally
sent back to me was a short paragraph, announcing the issuance of the first
issue and asking for contributions
Obviously, this was not much of a start, but nevertheless it was the
first issue (though never issued). What Slotcar Freak had found was that it
was a lot more work gathering articles than he or I had thought. But this
pattern basically continued. Next on tap was Louhal, 1@10, who put together
the first 4 or 5 actual issues of IceNEWS. The issues varied in length as well
as quality of content. It was about that time that I'd tried to formulate a
purpose for IceNEWS, and I arrived at two objectives:
1.) Provide an electronic News medium for the sysops of IceNET to have a forum
to present their writings in the news type format, so as to provide them
an avenue for getting some recognition for their efforts on a national
(now international) scale.
2.) Try to make each subsequent issue better than the last and target
WWIVnews, the defacto standard for such a publication, as a benchmark
to aim at in terms of quality.
Burn-out struck after the first issues from Louhal, so he was quietly but
honorably retired. Upon a national request for an editor, Spelunker, 1@7653,
and The Fez (now Deacon Blues), 2@7653 offered to take on the job. About three
more issues came forth, all good and in my opinion and continuing the steady
string of improvement in the content and presentation of the issues. But
again, the burn-out syndrome struck. The pressure to produce a quality issue
each and every month was too great, so Spelunker offered his resignation,
which I reluctantly accepted.
Next fodder in line for the Editor's spot was Special Agent, 1@7672.
Being a pillar of the BBS community, a very hard working person and sysop, and
one of the smartest sysops I know, I was sure we'd finally gotten an editor
who would turn out dynamite issues month after month and all my worries would
be settled. After a couple of issues, though, there was a lag and BAM! once
again I had a burned-out Editor.
But the light was starting to dawn on me...and when Deacon Blues came to
me about 6 months ago with a renewed interest in IceNEWS preparation, the time
was right not only for a new Editor, but also a new way of organizing our
work. With Deacon Blues the driving force, the IceNEWS staff was redeveloped
to include several new positions and the invocation of the concept of "team"
preparation began. A regular editorial hierarchy was established, with
Contributing Editors, a Managing Editor for each month, and an
Editor-In-Chief. Each succeeding issue would have a Managing Editor (M/E) who
would manage the current issue, then be able to 'relax' the next month as
another of the contributing editors took over the lead as M/E.
As of this issue, I'm hereby appointing Deacon Blues to my former
position of Editor-In-Chief, and from this point on my position will be as
"Publisher" of IceNEWS. Deacon Blues has certainly earned the position of
E-I-C, and under his leadership and constant attention I'm confident that
IceNEWS will continue to expand readership, as well as try new ideas in
content as well as presentation in the coming months.
Also, for the record, the following former participants on the
publication of IceNEWS who have since gone to Editor's Paradise, I hereby
induct into the IceNET Hall of Fame, IceNEWS wing:
Slotcar Freak
Geot
Louhal
Special Agent
Spelunker (still active as chief type-setter for IceNEWS)
Jim
I'll still write from time to time for IceNEWS, and contribute as I
can... so hail to the new Editor-In-Chief, Deacon Blues. May IceNEWS prosper
and thrive in his capable hands.
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і Comments From The M/E і Deacon Blues (2@7653)
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This May issue marks the sixth edition of IceNEWS to be published since
the journal's internal organization was re-structured (starting with the
December 1993 edition). In these past six issues, I feel that IceNEWS has
accomplished much. My fellow IceNEWS editors and I have done several things
with IceNEWS that had not been done with the journal before. Things like the
inclusion of multi-part stories (Will's "Building A PC" series, Jack Ryan's
"New WWIV Sysop Helpline," and Daarkhan's "Learning C Programming" series) and
original fiction ("The Adventures of ModemMan!" by Jot$ and myself).
We did other things behind the scenes as well in an attempt to improve
quality. When Jim decided to re-structure IceNEWS in October of 1993, he
wisely abolished the concept that IceNEWS could be put together by one or two
people and instead rounded-up a staff of people to handle the chores. For the
first time ever, people from outside the Buffalo area were given the
opportunity to become IceNEWS editors.
With a true staff for the first time, IceNEWS buried the image of being
simply a "newsletter" (the word is banned in our staff room) and became a
legitimate publication, complete with an editorial hierarchy. The journal was
split into departments, with each editor assigned to a specific interest.
People from Buffalo (Jim, myself, Spelunker, and, later, Louie) to
Massachusetts (Will) to Florida (Jack) to California (Ima) worked with pride
together with other writers recruited from many other geographic locales
around IceNET to put out the best publication we could. There was a newfound
sense of purpose and dedication that ran through the staff members that could
never have been achieved under the old way of doing things.
IceNEWS also opened itself up more to its readers. We added a column for
"Letters to the Editors," something that IceNEWS never had before. To further
the lines of communication between the readers and the editors, the "IceNEWS
Beat" sub (subtype IceNEWS, host @1) was created to allow readers to chat
directly with the editors themselves (and to pick up "inside" info on upcoming
IceNEWS stories). IceNEWS also started campaigning sysops to share the journal
with the other users of their systems as to allow for both maximum exposure of
the journal and maximum feedback from our readers regarding how we put it
together.
To get a better feel for reader response, I wrote and distributed a
questionnaire asking readers to tell us what they thought of IceNEWS to that
point (February, 1994). We were quite pleased by the number of positive
responses we received from those people who wrote back. Many wisely availed
themselves of the opportunity to tell us what they would like to see in future
editions of the journal. Many of those suggestions either already have been,
or are in the process of being, acted upon by us.
Shortly after the questionnaire was published, however, responses from
readers to the IceNEWS staff regarding the journal dropped sharply. Input and
feedback from readers has dropped to near nil. In fact, this May issue is the
first time since January that we have had any letters to print in our "Letters
to the Editors" column. A sad and alarming state, to be sure. The editors of
IceNEWS need to hear from you regarding how well we are handling our task of
providing you with a top-quality publication worth the time it takes for you
to read it.
Tell us what you think about what we've done. Do you want multi-part,
comprehensive stories strung-out over a number of consecutive issues or would
you prefer to see an entire edition devoted to a single topic? Would you like
to see IceNEWS include "open" editorials from people regarding any subject or
do you not like opinions with your network journal and want to see us stick to
straight-up technical and network-specific fare?
What about creative fiction, like "The Adventures of ModemMan?" Did you
like it? Did you dislike it? Did you even read it? Would you like to see more
stuff of this nature (maybe even a sequel to MM)? How about other stuff like
poetry? Do puzzles and games (such as the one in this issue) catch your fancy?
Or should we do as one reader suggested and simply do away with the Lite Bytes
department entirely because it's just cheap filler to pad-out the issue? We
can't say either way unless YOU tell US.
I cannot stress enough the need for our readers to keep in contact with
the editors regarding the future of IceNEWS. If there's something about
IceNEWS that you like, or don't like, or want to see happen with IceNEWS in
the future, we need to know about it. Please take the time to drop us a note
saying what you think. Who knows, your letter may even wind-up getting printed
as one of our "Letters to the Editors" in an upcoming edition.
Without your help, we won't be able to continue to keep up the fine
quality of work that we have done for you, the readers, thus far. Show that
you care about IceNEWS by getting involved and making your voice heard.
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ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Letters To The Editors і Compiled by: Louie (6@1)
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The IceNEWS Letters To The Editors column is a forum for the readers to
express their feelings, thoughts, or opinions regarding IceNEWS. Please take
the time to write us regarding your feelings on IceNEWS and its contents, good
or bad. We want to hear what you have to say. Remember, IceNEWS is meant for
EVERYONE in IceNET and we need YOUR input in order to maintain a successful
and respected publication.
Please address any remarks or questions to:
IceNEWS Letters To The Editors
c/o Louie, #6 @1
IceNEWS Editor-At-Large
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From Special Agent, #1 @7672:
Dear Editor At Large:
I am making my complaints known! I am peeved, how dare you guys
contribute to helping Wayne Bell make us pay for all the downloads we leech
off of Paragon and other WWIV BBSs. I call this an outrage! I am very
disappointed that an organization such as IceNEWS and an editor of your
quality would scoop so low as to do this!
I am taking a class action suit out on behalf of all my leeching friends,
and when the 1099's come we will use them for toilet paper!!!!
Sincerely,
Special Agent #1 @7672
PS!!! Great job on this months (April 94) IceNEWS! I caught your April
fools joke as you can see. <G> I am so glad that I gave up my editor job to
users as talented as yourself and Deacon Blues, and of course Martin, Ima
Moron and others.
Keep up the great work, we may even see readership on the issues now!
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From Rockhead, #1 @5350, to the IceNEWS staff regarding IceNET and IceNEWS:
I am writing this to you to inform you of what a wonderful job everyone
has been doing at IceNEWS. I have only been is IceNET for about 6 months now
and have to say that the effort put into this NET is tremendous.
Regarding IceNEWS, I think this is a great idea and wish to see more
people get involved with it. I would like to see more articles on WWIV
utilities. I would also like to see a place in it for Mod Of The Month. How
about one column for on going C programming and Pascal? What about basic
reviews on new games and applications for computers? A technology column?
I would like to say "great job" to everyone involved and hope you
consider some of these option I have given. Good Luck in the future with
IceNEWS.
Rockhead #1 @5350
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Deacon Blues, Managing Editor for this issue, responds:
Thanks for the kind words. I know that everyone here appreciates them. To
answer your questions and comments: IceNEWS is currently attempting to beef-up
our editorial staff and we're always looking for people who wish to write
articles. We also have a couple of stories in the works regarding WWIV
utilities. Hopefully, these endeavors will come to fruition within the next
month or two.
Regarding ongoing C programming and Pascal articles, we have managed to
secure two more parts to the ongoing "Learning C" column by Daarkhan, 1@ We
also hope to be able to provide future stories on Pascal. Your ideas about
reviews and a tech column are also things that have been put under future
consideration for when we have more people who can cover all the bases.
Mod-Of-The-Month was a regular IceNEWS feature at one time but was
discontinued as of the December 1993 issue. It was felt by some of the staff
that the column was not needed due to the number of Mod and Mod discussion
subs in the various WWIV networks. Another concern was the idea of publishing
Mods that could be read by non-registered sysops or regular users. However,
the door remains open on bringing back a Mod-Of-The-Month column and, if there
are others who wish to see this feature reinstated, it could very well happen.
If anyone else would like (or even not like) to see Mod-Of-The-Month
brought back as a regular feature in IceNEWS, drop us some mail and let us
know.
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ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
ДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДЩ F E A T U R E S T O R I E S АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Being A Sysop: A Female's Perspective і Daydreamer (2@4501)
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДБДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
IceNEWS asked Daydreamer, #2 @4501, to write on her views about being a
female sysop:
The question is... what is the difference if you're a female and a sysop.
Now actually I find that rather sexist, and it has been a thorn in the heel of
the Other Gender since the first asking.
So here is my rendition of "Female Sysops" the Best of the Best. < so
there>
Let me see, what could the differences be, we all hit F10 for chat, F5
when we want the system, drop to DOS to find that elusive file, validate on a
semi-regular basis. We Mod when the mood strikes us and forget where the
computer is located when we're having a bad day.
We rise and shine to check the net connect and fix the callout.net that
always seems to demand attention. We meet the demands of the users who are
also confused as to how a "Mere" woman could possibly know any thing at all
about computers and BBS systems, modems, archives, modding, and the like.
After helping the users setup their modems, defaults and finally going
over to check their computers, well, I am partially offended when they act
surprised that I even possess the knowledge to do these things. Then they want
to know why I do these things.
Female sysops are a new breed, fighting for there right to co-exist in
what has traditionally been a man's world. Women have moved right out of the
kitchen into the computer room, demanding equal time on the keyboard and
withholding favors and talents if the demands are not met.
We fend-off the offers to take our minds off things that do not concern
us, making the effort not to destroy the ego of the asking party. Frequent
callers are rewarded with chat time with the sys-person, we listen to sad
tales, glad tales and share in the joys and sorrows of our users. We dispense
advice when asked for it and offer a helping hand when a user is having a
difficult time. We have encouraged children to clean there room, do there
homework, and then modem, insuring that they will be able to call again. We
have worked on math problems, flow charting and solved the mystery of why
little brother keeps deleting the callout directory.
Now a word from a male sysop and how he feels about "the other gender."
Bear in mind that no threats have been made to ensure that there comments are
favorable. We do not fold and mutilate those whose opinions vary from ours.
Although, one of them may show a little frustration at the "did you read the
docs" question...
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Alkar, #1 @4506, writes:
Well, I never really cared whether or not Daydreamer was female. It was
never an issue to me. All I knew is that she was a very competent and helpful
sysop. When I first brought up Alkar's Keep, her and Admiral C.C. were the
ones who came over and helped me set it up (as well as clean up my apartment
and train my roommate's dog not to be so attracted to legs!). And all this was
accomplished in two one-hour visits!
I imagine she was getting kind of perturbed with me whenever I would call
her at all hours of the night whenever my board would develop a problem. After
a while, I should have realized that the first words out of her mouth,
whenever I would call, would be, "Have you read the docs?" That is the one
phrase that can really bring me down! <grin>
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ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Life As An IceNET GC і Dr Diversity (1@8400)
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДБДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
Hello everyone! This is your friendly neighborhood Spider...err GC
checking in. Those of you in Group 1 have probably talked to me at one time or
another and some of you from other Groups may have had contact with me but for
those of you who haven't, how's it going?
Well, things are fine here but quite busy this time of year. Like many
other SysOps that I know, I'm attending college full time and trying to run
the best BBS that I can. Unfortunately I've got to work too. Well, we can't
all have it easy. Fortunately the semester is almost over and things will be
much easier for me this summer. (Thank God!)
Anyway, I was asked to write a little article on life as a GC and I
figured I'd give it a shot. Here's an idea of what the GCs for IceNET go
through (and it's probably the same in all of the networks). Those of you
seeking a job as a GC, keep this in mind. <grin>
The regular things I handle, or try to, are my own board. Most of my
users just log on to play games or leech files so there isn't much I
absolutely have to do to handle things. But every once in a while I do end up
with someone who is interested in more. (What a relief!)
Every day I get about ten to fifteen messages regarding updates for
systems joining the network, dropping out of the network, or needing changes
in the network files. These changes are usually easy enough to, do but I
usually hold off a couple of days so updates don't happen too often, too
quickly, or cause problems. Dropping systems and making changes to the BBS
information and connections are the easiest to handle. New systems aren't too
difficult to handle, but, with IceNET growing as fast as it is, sometimes it
gets a little hard to keep up with.
Every once in a while a rather new area grows large enough to warrant the
need for an AC to be elected. This is where the difficulties start to crop up.
I've had very good success rates with most of the ACs I've worked with. I've
only had an occasional episode of inter-area problems but they are few and
usually resolved well enough for things to continue normally. It definitely is
interesting 'training' a new AC. Form letters make a good teacher...sometimes.
For those of you who aren't aware, IceNET now requires that WWIV be
registered after a two month trial period. I give unregistered systems the
benefit of the doubt and I don't always drop them right away. I always try to
contact them to see if they've begun the partial payment plan. I find that
it's much easier to just extend the trial period instead of removing a system
just to add them back later (after they have registered). It's also much less
of a hassle to the SysOp(s) involved.
On rare occasions, a dispute comes up in an area and it falls to the
responsibility of the AC to handle, unless the AC is one of the disputees. If
the AC is not able to come to a resolution, the disputees then come to me for
assistance in handling any problems. This is probably the most time-consuming
task of being a GC. These types of situations don't happen often but they grow
slowly and usually aren't settled very quickly. Fortunately most of IceNET
gets along rather well. <keep the fingers crossed folks!>
Another side benefit of being GC is that everyone will email you for
answers to various questions. I personally take pride in things like that
since it makes me feel better that others can come to me for assistance. It
helps me realize that the knowledge I've learned isn't going to be wasted.
These types of questions are the second most common things a GC receives (the
first being updates).
Well, that's about the best of things as far as I can relate. There are a
lot of things that a GC handles that aren't often noticed by most people in
the network. If you can imagine how much time this job takes up, I'm sure
you'd have an extreme appreciation for the work and effort that Jim, Filo, and
Random do to make WWIV and networking as good as it is. (Then again, Jim's got
some dedicated people helping him out...how unfair..<Grin>).
When you get a chance, please let your AC, GC, or NC know what a
wonderful job you think they are doing. In Group 1, I can definitely say that
the ACs are doing a very good job and I'm pleased with the progress that this
Group has seen. If anyone has any questions or comments, feel free to drop me
a line. My mailbox is always open.
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ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Let's Get Together: Starting BBS Events і Louie (6@1)
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Summer time is just around the corner. That means nice weather is almost
upon us. Time to start thinking of the summer's BBS Events. What's that? Your
area doesn't have BBS gatherings? Well, that is a shame. BBSers should all get
together every now and again just so we remember we are all real people at the
other end of the modem and not just some weird Artificial Intelligence
Projects (or lack thereof).
GETTING TOGETHER
In the 716 area code where I am from, BBS Events are a long-held
tradition. I have been BBSing for five and one-half years now and within the
first few months of my being involved, I had gone to a Kingdom of Renjevyick
Picnic. The Kingdom was a great board from WNY BBS history that now is a dead
phone line in the sky. But I remember all the folks I met at that picnic. It
was a great time for everybody.
Other picnics were held that year. I went to them all. I met lots of fun
people that year. Rebo, Perseus, Pillsbury Dough Boy, The Piper, Jammin' Joe,
Pirate, Eh ???/Zenith, IBM Monk, Far Side, etc. etc. I met a lot of fun people
that summer. Some of them have become close friends, others became friends for
a while until we drifted apart. Others I haven't seen since, but I remember
then with fondness.
In 716 the picnics evolved away from one board events into Western New
York All BBS Events. We try to involve all boards in the area in the Picnics,
Wing Dings, and other events.
WHAT TO GET TOGETHER FOR
Many types of events have occurred in Western New York. We have had our
Picnics, Pizza-Movie Events, Winterfests, THITs, Splatball, house parties, and
"Wing Dings" (our Crown Jewel of BBS events).
WING DINGS
Wing Dings came about the year after I first got involved in BBSing.
Buffalo is famous for Chicken Wings around the nation. Well, on the Kingdom of
Renjevyick and The Far Side (two boards both defunct now), a small band of us
got to talking about who could eat the most HOT Chicken Wings. All of us,
being the great HE-MEN we liked to think we were, started to brag about eating
hot wings. (I know, we seem to have been rather stupid. I don't deny it.)
Well, Perseus got to telling us all about some really really HOT wings
you could get at some local bar in Depew (a small village just outside of
Buffalo). We all claimed we could eat 20 wings at this place Perseus told us
about. It was a small hole-in-the wall bar called "Sal's." Naturally, Perseus
- being the intelligent one among us (and having tried to eat a Sal's Wing in
the past) - dared us all to show up at Sal's and try eating one, let alone 20.
Seven brave putzoids took the "Sal's Suicide Challenge," as it has since
been called. The brave adventures were : Perseus, Rebo, David C. (who has
since changed his handle to The Wizard), Gordon Sumner (who has since wandered
away from WNY BBSing), John Hardball, The Pillsbury Dough Boy, and myself.
Due to a mix-up, only one of us got the "Suicidal" wings. That person was
myself (oh, lucky me). I managed to eat 8 of those Hellish things. I have
never tried to eat another one since. I know when I have met my limits.
It was a fun time for the seven of us. We went back to PDB's and
goofed-off there for a couple of hours and then we all broke up again. We
talked about the "event from hell" on KOR and Far Side and others took an
interest in what we were talking about. They, like we had originally, thought
there wasn't a hot chicken wing they could not master. Little did they know...
We decided to hold a Second Wing Ding at Sal's. About 20-odd folks showed
up for Part Two. Among those that turned out for the second hellish experience
were Kilometers, The Piper, Jammin' Joe, Zot, Swashbuckler, Eh ???, Pirate,
etc. etc., as well as the original seven of us.
At this second Wing Ding Rebo managed to eat 20 of the hellish wings.
And, as Rebo later put it, he had trouble in the bathroom for a week. Rebo is
the only idiot to manage to eat 20 of the evil wings. (He can be reached at
1@7660 in WWIVnet and 1@17660 in WWIVlink).
At Wing Ding Three (the first Wing Ding to be called a Wing Ding), Csev
The Wanderer managed to eat 11. The top three folks at eating wings are Rebo,
Csev, and myself. I titled the Wing Dings that myself. I said something like
"See you all at the Wing Ding later tonight," and the name of the event was
born.
Perseus was the Wing Ding Czar for about three years. Perseus was in
charge of organization because it was his original idea. I, however, have
since inherited the Czarship. I am about to hold my 5th Wing Ding myself. It
will be the 22nd Wing Ding in a long glorious history of WNY BBSing.
Wing Dings are something we are very proud of, as you probably already
guessed. These are sometimes other gatherings at local restaurant/bars. People
come out to eat dinner and spend the evening talking and meeting other BBSers.
For dinner we hype the Chicken Wings, but it is not a requirement.
PICNICS
Picnics are nice events for summer weather. We normally get together at
Beaver Island State Park three or four times over the course of the summer. We
then regularly have one End of Summer Picnic at Chestnut Ridge Park.
To hold a picnic you need a large park. Someplace everybody pretty much
knows exists and knows how to get to. Don't choose some small, out-of-the-way
park that very few people know about. The park should have picnic tables,
shelters, big open spaces, parking areas and bathrooms. Other secondary things
to look for are things like baseball/softball diamonds, basketball courts,
volleyball nets, and playground equipment for the tykes. Also, try to pick a
place in the park that is easy for people to find where everybody can meet
when they first get to the picnic.
Remember the Bring-Your-Own-Stuff mentality. Make it plain to everybody
that food and drink is not being provided by you when you advertise the
picnic. Sure, you are a nice person, but I am sure you can't provide hot dogs
for 100+ folks. Remember to bring a grill to cook on, too, since some parks
don't provide them.
In Western New York, we have gotten turnout for picnics to push 175-200
folks at times. We advertise the heck out our picnics.
MOVIE-PIZZA NIGHTS
Movie-Pizza events are another thing we like to do around 716. In this we
pick a movie to see and a time to see it. Then we choose a time about two
hours before the movie starts to meet a local pizza Joint, normally a Pizza
Hut. We meet, eat, and chat at the restaurant, then go see the film of choice.
Sometimes, we even keep things going afterward by maybe either heading off to
a bar or to somebody's house afterwards.
These are good to do with a funny movie, sometime like "Wayne's World" or
"Naked Gun" type films. Don't try this with "Schindler's List." This is
supposed to be a fun event and a serious or weighty movie can really put a
damper on the fun.
THITS
A THIT (standing for "Thank Heavens It's Thursday) was an adult-type Wing
Ding before there were Wing Dings. We have not had one in a long time around
here. Adult themes may be something to stay away from anyway. BBSing already
gets a bad enough rap in the press with the "We're all Pirates and X-rated GIF
Makers" guff you see. Besides, there are usually many BBSers in an area that
are minors and would be unable to attend. One of the reasons that Wing Dings
and Picnics have been so popular is that they are open to all-ages.
WINTERFESTS
Ok, I'm a dude from Buffalo, and in Buffalo some of the more insane among
us Picnic in the snow. Every year, Chestnut Ridge Park is home to a
county-sponsored Winter Festival near the end of January. It's always very fun
to get together at Chestnut Ridge and have snowball fights, go sledding, and
play football on a snow covered field... and not just touch football either.
We play a full-scale tackle/kill-the-enemy-brand of football. These are great
fun, but it's impractical to try to organize one of these in Southern
California or Florida or anywhere else that snow doesn't fare well.
HOUSE PARTIES
House Parties can be pretty good fun. Around 716, the house party expert
is The Piper (16@7686). House parties do call for the host in question to
provide some supplies; like chips, pop, maybe a pizza or two. It isn't
uncalled to ask the quests to each put in a few bucks to pay the pizza
delivery person, though. You will probably want to keep these semi-private
affairs, though. Don't advertise on every BBS in your area "House Party at
Louie's". You don't want 100+ idiots showing up and burning the house to the
ground. A house party should be for the BBS Event "regulars" and others that
you are fairly-well acquainted with. Don't let just anybody into your house
for a party that you don't know or haven't met before. Use simple common sense
on who you invite and don't tolerate "crashers" who may have found out about
your gathering through third-party word-of-mouth.
SPLATBALL (PAINTBALL)
Splatball was tried in WNY a few times. Rebo organized this three times.
It did involve collecting money up front, though. Also, one must pay for the
paintballs that they shoot over the course of a session. Fees paid to the
facility usually only cover the field fee and the rental of a gun (more
generous field owners may include one or two free tubes of paintballs with gun
rental). With prices ranging between $2.00 to $4.00 per tube of paintballs (a
tube contains 10 paintballs), trigger-happy players can wind-up spending a
fair sum of money over the course of one session (a session usually consists
of about 5 or 6 complete games, depending on the field). A session usually
lasts about three hours (depending on how quickly individual games are
completed).
Splatball is also dangerous (at least potentially) and you don't want to
be held liable by some insurance company because you let some real idiot play
that shouldn't have been allowed in. Deacon Blues used to play on a regular
basis for a couple of years and can tell several "war stories" about players
being injured on the field while involved in a game (including one incident in
which he was involved). Many paintball fields also have a minimum age
restriction for players, so minors may or may not be allowed.
Also, Splatball is a "dirty" game in that you are always either being hit
by paint or otherwise rubbing up against walls (when played indoors) that are
splattered with paint from stray shots. Splatball is also a game that usually
requires a fair amount of running. By the time that an evening's play is over,
participants are usually too sweaty and dirty and tired to do anything
afterward but go home and count the bruises.
WHAT TO CONSIDER BEFORE GETTING TOGETHER
There are a few other things to consider about BBS Events before actually
getting one together.
Advertising was something I brought up a few times in passing. You
advertise a BBS Event by posting messages about it. In 716 we have the 716
General Chat Subs in IceNET and WWIVnet as well as a few Event Planning Subs.
We post the messages about Wing Dings and picnics on these subs. I also
normally e-mail a copy of an add to each 716 IceNET, WWIVnet and WWIVLink
Sysop and ask him to tell his/her users about the event.
You also should consider how many people you want to attend a BBS event
before you start an advertising blitz. If you want over 100+ people to attend
(which a picnic could easily support) then it pretty much does not matter how
much you advertise it. You may not want more than 50 people for a Wing Ding
(or other restaurant or bar-dependent activity) though. In that case, I
normally only advertise on IceNET and WWIVnet. We have other various small
networks around (QuadNet, DragonNET, MicroNet, etc.) and you will reach more
people by advertising on such nets. But that means you will get largest
attendance as well.
Sometimes you don't wish for a huge attendance. If you think that this
sounds contradictory to the very idea of getting together, let me relate to
you some of the problems that we have had with our Wing Dings.
Two problems we ran into with Wing Dings had to do with money and the
place we hold the event. We started out holding Wing Dings at Sal's, a very
small mom-and-pop-type bar with a capacity of about 25 people. After word
spread around town about the Wing Dings, attendance skyrocketed. We quickly
outgrew that small place. Sal's was good for an event that would get 25 folks
at the most. We have since gotten 125 at some Wing Dings recently. In the end,
Sal kicked us out because we simply over-ran his small establishment (and put
a serious hurt on his very limited staff).
We had to locate another place to hold the event. We did... but they only
let us stay for two gatherings. Some folks got a little rowdy and tossed some
birthday cake around and made a general nuisance of themselves. So, we were
tossed out of our second home.
Since then we have been asked to leave about five places. We have
Hemingway's, a nice bar in downtown Buffalo that likes us now... but we will
probably only be there one or two times more. Trying to find a new how right
now.
The main problems we have had with restaurants are folks being rowdy and
the restaurant wanting us to have up-front money. Restaurants want up front
money for some good reasons though. 1.) People sometimes stiff on bills from a
group of folks (another reason we were asked to leave one establishment). 2.)
People from a group sometimes cause damage (as evidenced by the cake-throwing
incident). 3.) It is easier to get 300 bucks from the group and then put out a
buffet of 300 bucks worth of food.
Up-front money is a bad idea normally. Why? Because it can cause
problems. If you have to ask people to put in $4 before hand some complain "I
only ate $3 worth of food while he ate $7 worth of food" and similar
complaints. It is also easier for people to manage their own bills. If you eat
$5 bucks worth of wings, then you pay for $5 bucks worth.
Another aspect of concern to the owners of the establishments we've held
Wing Dings at is the issue of under-age drinking. You can't have kids showing
up a Wing Ding (or picnic, or anything else, for that matter) and illegally
drinking. This issue also cost the Wing Dings a home when someone of legal age
bought a minor a drink from a bar. Due to this (and even prior to the
instance) we (those of legal age) watch for this like hawks around 716 BBS
Events. Some of us take a look every now and again at what folks are drinking
if they are young. It might not be something you want to do but it is
something you have to look out for. If some kid gets arrested for DWI on the
way home from a BBS Event... the police and the parents might have some
questions to ask the Organizers and the Sysops.
WHAT TO DO AT AN EVENT
Other little things we do... We have a sign in sheet where people sign
their handles to a sheet so we know how many showed up. That is how we know we
had 175+ for some picnics and a 125+ for some Wing Dings.
I normally go around trying to meet everybody as well. Some people just
want to talk to a few people they already know. Others, like me, try to get to
know and exchange a few words with everybody. Remember, the idea is to meet
people. The saying we have for our events is "Come out and meet the faces
behind the handles," and that's what everyone should try to do.
CONCLUSION
Well, that is all I can think of to say about Western New York's BBS
events. We are going to have a lot of them this summer. I hope some other
parts of the country also have BBS Events. One of the ideas of BBSing is to
meet more people. Local, regional, and national BBS Events can go a long way
in helping to do that. They are great fun. Who knows, WWIVCon '94 may just end
up being one huge BBS Event from Hell. Lets hope so.
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ДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДЩ W W I V - S P E C I F I C АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Protecting WWIV і Papa Bear (1@5079)
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДБДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
I was approached by the IceNEWS editorial staff and asked if I would
write an article on how to protect WWIV. Actually, I was asked to write an
article explaining why WWIV is hard to hack. I've given it some thought, and
I'd thought I'd fudge a bit write a little about the latter, and a lot on the
former.
Why is WWIV hard to hack? It has to do with the years of development both
by WWIV Software Services, and independent modders (people who modify WWIV
source code) such as myself.
You see, in the past, when a way to hack WWIV was found, fixes were
released, and instructions were given so as to close those holes in security.
As time went on, those fixes and instructions have become in integral part of
WWIV coding.
For instance. Some people still believe that you can use the ol'
????????.??? filename trick in the archive extract section to allow you to
upload a rouge program that ultimately will allow a hacker access to DOS, and
therefore your entire machine. Well, when this particular hack was found, the
steps were taken to make sure it didn't happen any more. Indeed, try it
yourself! You'll find that WWIV no longer accepts ????????.??? as a filename.
This trashes that hack.
Ultimately, all hacks are squashed in this manner. As new ones are found,
if they are found, they will be corrected immediately.
Now, for extra protection just in case someone manages to hack your BBS,
here are steps you can take to 1) stop any hack attempt before they are done,
and 2) limit any damage done. They are arranged by levels, from those who run
stock WWIV, to those who mod heavily.
Stock WWIV protective steps:
1. Back up all of your data files to tape or diskette nightly.
[This way, if you are hacked, and your BBS is trashed, you can be back up
in a matter of hours.]
2. NEVER grant 255 security levels other than those people you absolutely
trust. Do not grant 255 to people who are just good friends.
[Ya never know when things can go sour. And the easiest way to hack a
BBS is to have a SysOp account.]
3. Ensure that files that are called by the BBS are called in the following
manner:
{drive}:\{path}\{filename}.{extension} {command line switches}
For example, for a file transfer protocol:
c:\files\dsz.exe port %2 speed %1 ha slow rz -mrr %3
Or for a archiving program:
x:\morefile\evenmore\pkunzip.exe -o -e %1 %2
[How can a rouge program called DSZ.COM run if the BBS calls DSZ.EXE
specifically by path and filename? It can't]
4. Limit all uploads to one directory. Make it a SysOp-access only
directory.
[I know this can be a pain in the rear. But this way no one can mess
with a programs internal files if they can't get to it once uploaded.]
5. Make things doubly secure by TELLING your transfer protocols to transfer
only into the SysOp directory. HS/Link allows you to do this in its CFG
file. If I remember correctly, DSZ/GSZ allow this by environment
variable.
6. Use a nightly batch file to check the files in the SysOp's dir. You
can easily scan for viruses, recomment, rearchive, etc. these files
automatically while you sleep. Have it REBOOT the machine when done.
[Doing this allows you to search for viruses. If found, you can have
most scanners simply delete the program, and make a log entry. You
don't get the virus because the program was never run. Recommenting
removes any possibility of ANSI bombs remaining in the file (rebooting
removes the chance of them ever taking effect). Use Norton Utilities
BE REBOOT command to do the job, or some other rebooting program. I
also take this time to defrag. the HD, GIFLITE .GIF files, and a few
other chores.]
7. Never, never, never run any program that looks suspicious, or, that a
person you don't know keeps pressuring you to run. Most legit shareware
program are very well documented. Most all have .REG/.DOC/.DIZ/et al
files. If you find a file that simply has an .EXE or .COM file in it,
it is safer to just delete it. Besides, 99.99999% of the time it is crip
anyway. [This keeps you from inadvertently hacking your own BBS by running
a virus or trojan file.]
8. Write protect all of you .EXE, .COM, and .BAT files that you use to run
the BBS. Use the ATTRIB command to do this.
[This keeps important executable files from being overwritten by
anything, possibly a rouge program.]
9. Change the name of ATTRIB.COM, FORMAT.COM, FDISK.COM etc... in your DOS
directory. Just make 'em something else you can remember. Better yet,
copy them to a floppy and delete them from the HD.
[How can a person format your HD if they have no formatting program, no
way to repartition, the HD, or un-write protect any programs?]
10. Do not use a personal P/W that is easy to figure out. Do not use an INIT
password that is obvious. Using a the WWIV's random personal password is
a good idea. Do not use that password, or anything resembling it on any
other BBS. Pick an INIT P/W from the funny papers at random.
[Don't make it easy on the potential hacker by "giving" them your P/W!]
11. DO NOT INSTALL *ANY* program that requires the use of DOORWAY unless you
are intimately familiar with that program's drop to DOS features, and
DOORWAY's command line structure to limit those DOS calls.
[Do not let your ignorance grant an easy "back door" into your BBS.]
12. Do not install any online game that remotely looks suspicious. Remove
any that crash regularly, for unexplained reasons.
[Door programs, now, are THE #1 way for anyone to hack a BBS. Why?
Because unless the SysOp wrote the door himself, he has NO IDEA how it
written, and what weakness/back doors may be installed in it. Personally,
I try to stick to well known door authors and popular games that a lot of
SysOps run.]
13. Only allow people you TRUST have access the BBS computer, or any machine
where you may have WWIV source coding. Disconnect the keyboard if having
a BBS party in your home when not at the machine, and people you don't
really know are present.
[Simple. An unscrupulous person would love the opportunity to get your
passwords, and source code hack work-arounds first-hand.]
14. Tell family members not to press F9 or change a user's access while that
user is online. Unless, of course, they are SysOp's too :)
[Don't let the potential hacker talk your loved ones into letting them
into your BBS!]
Light modification tips. (You must be a registered WWIV owner, with the
source code, and own a copy of Borland C++ or Turbo C++ to do these.)
1. Rename the //DOS command in BBS.C, IE:
if (strcmp(s,"Q1W2E3R4T5Y6")==0) { // <<< CHANGED DOS TO Q1W2E3R4T5Y6
if (checkpw()) {
write_inst(INST_LOC_DOS,0,INST_FLAGS_ONLINE);
sysoplog(get_stringx(1,6));
shrink_out(getenv("COMSPEC"),1,1,1,0);
topscreen();
}
}
[Who's gonna run //Q1W2E3R4T5Y6 to drop to DOS?]
2. Add a second password in XINIT.C:
sprintf(s,"WWIV_NET.DAT");
unlink(s);
randomize();
if (!restoring_shrink)
catsl();
write_inst(INST_LOC_WFC,0,INST_FLAGS_NONE);
strcpy(syscfg.systempw,"SLURPEE"); // << THIS IS THE NEW SYSTEM P/W }
[With this, the P/W in INIT will only be used to access INIT. This makes
it so that in order to even log on as a 255 account, you *MUST* now this
new P/W. All internal commands need this one as well. The beauty is that
it does not appear in any data file anywhere. So if you are hacked, the
hacker will know your INIT password, but not the one required for BBS
access!]
More advanced source code tactics.
1. The most common place WWIV seems to be hacked at is the archive commands
in the file transfer section. I believe them to be quite safe, now (I
haven't heard of a single legit hack for 4.24 anyway). In any case, you
can remove the entire XFERTMP.C file (save two functions) along with the
calling statements in BBS.C/XFER.C. This not only removes the supposed
"weak link", but saves on memory. I've never had anyone use them anyway.
2. Do not introduce any coding that can access a disk drive or CDROM that has
a possibility of not answering up properly when called. For example: if
you install my SPV-042E.MOD modification, and you tell it to look for a
CDROM on drive F: and you have no drive F: (or you do have a drive F:, but
no CD in the drive), and a person types //CDROM, you're gonna see a DOS
level error condition generated: (A)bort, (R)etry, (F)ail? {OS/2 just
plain freaks out here!} This can lead to an eventual drop to DOS.
Although the user will not have any access at the DOS prompt, it is not a
comfortable place for your BBS to be.
Again, unless a SysOp "helps" the would be hacker in some way, there
really is no way into DOS from WWIV except, possibly, door programs. Even
then, a legitimate door author would not deliberately write in a DOS drop of
any kind. If it were ever found out, they'd be dead in the BBS world.
I've been doing this for 13 years now, and I've never had a successful
hack attempt. A little work and common sense goes a LONG way!
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ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і What's Wrong With WWIVMAIL/QWK? і Ima Moron (1@9661)
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДБДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
After hearing about the row written about WWIVMAIL/QWK on the WWIVNet
subboards I thought I'd remove the mystery surrounding one fine BBS utility.
Some time ago, like around WWIVMAIL/QWK 4.22 I wrote Micheal Lieb, the author
of the utility, some snail mail in which I said it would be a long time before
I sent him $25.00 of my money. I thought at the time Mike did a lousy job of
the documenting file included with the software. Mike also practically never
answers E-mail. Well, for as long as I've kept track of his QWK program he
hasn't. He likes to have questions posted on the WWIVMAIL/QWK support subboard
and respond publicly to any questions about it.
But I was wrong to knock his QWK system, since I'd never taken the time
to post on that subboard and allow Mr. Lieb an opportunity to ex plain the
setup of his QWK door. Since then I've acquired some QWK savvy and I've
registered the utility.
In the beginning, Michael Lieb created a limited QWK compatible message
transferring utility in which he attempted to allow BBS users total
configuration of the utility on the first screen. It took Mike quite a while
to realize that people who use utilities don't want to think, they want
instant automated access to QWK or whatever, and it must be cool! He also
learned that many sysops out there are still in primary reading studies and
that he shouldn't substitute a scientific paper for a documentation file.
But enough of my chastising Mike, I've written this article to praise the
Ceasar of WWIV-QWK, not to bury him. Below I'll clearly state how to install
WWIVMAIL/QWK version 4.54 with WWIV version 4.23, the current versions of both
of the softwares. If you wish, you sysop may install it and judge for
yourselves Michael Lieb's work. Below that, I'll add some out takes from
Michael Lieb's WWIVMAIL.DOC file wherein he explains items of interest to OS/2
users and to sysops running modified USSERRECs.
---- Proper Installation of WWIVQWK.EXE With Stock USERREC BBSs----
---- Operating Under DOS ----
±±Ь ±±Ь ±±Ь ±±Ь ±±Ь ±±Ь ±±Ы ±±±ЬЬ±±±Ь ±±±±±±Ь ±±Ь ±±Ь
±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы±±Ы±±Ы ±±ЫЯ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы
±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ЯЯ±±Ы ±±±±±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы
±±Ы±±Ь±±Ы ±±Ы±±Ь±±Ы ±±Ы ±±±±ЫЯ ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы
Я±±±±ЫЯЯ Я±±±±ЫЯЯ ±±Ы ±±ЫЯ ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±Ы ±±±±±±Ь
ЯЯЯЯ ЯЯЯЯ ЯЯ ЯЯ ЯЯ ЯЯ ЯЯ ЯЯ ЯЯ ЯЯЯЯЯЯ
A .QWK-QWK/2 Compatible Off-Line Mail Door For
WWIV 4.23 BBS System.
WWIVMail/QWK V4.54
Copyright (c)1993 By Michael Leib
with additional pieces (c) 1993 by Wayne Bell.
---- WMAIL454.ZIP ----
I. Archive File Contents
========================
WWIVQWK.EXE SUB NUMBER SELF-DETECTING WWIVMail/QWK EXECUTABLE.
WWIVMAIL.DOC DOCUMENTATION/HISTORY FOR/OF WWIVMail/QWK. (THIS FILE)
WWIVMAIL.CFG SAMPLE SYSOP CONFIGURATION FILE (OPTIONAL).
REGISTER.LST LISTING OF ALL CURRENTLY REGISTERED SYSOP/BBS SYSTEMS.
REGISTER.FRM REGISTRATION FORM TO BE MAILED WITH PAYMENT.
QWK.MAK MAKEFILE TO COMPILE AND LINK WWIVQWK.EXE FROM QWK.LIB
QWK.LIB WWIVMail/QWK LIBRARY TO LINK WITH USERREC.CPP
USERREC.H HEADER FILE FOR USERREC.CPP
USERREC.CPP .CPP FILE TO COMPILE WITH YOUR VARDEC.H AND LINK WITH QWK.LIB
Included in the archive is two files that you will need to place in your
WWIV or main BBS directory, wwivqwk.exe and wwivmail.cfg - do it. Now call up
wwivedit with the //edit command and load the wwivmail.cfg file, remember
this; you must edit the file to include 23 lines and the placement of data on
the correct line is critical! Below is the layout of WWIVMAIL.CFG;
LINE1: The CITY/STATE where your BBS is located.
LINE2: Maximum TOTAL messages that can be downloaded at 300 Baud.
LINE3: Maximum TOTAL messages that can be downloaded at 1200 Baud.
LINE4: Maximum TOTAL messages that can be downloaded at 2400 Baud.
LINE5: Maximum TOTAL messages that can be downloaded at 9600 Baud.
LINE6: Maximum TOTAL messages that can be downloaded at 14400 Baud.
LINE7: Maximum TOTAL messages that can be downloaded at 19200 Baud.
LINE8: Maximum TOTAL messages that can be downloaded at 38400 Baud.
LINE9: Full Path to BULLETIN #1 (LEAVE ANY OF THESE BLANK TO IGNORE)
LINE10: Full Path to BULLETIN #2 (or create bulletins for your users)
LINE11: Full Path to BULLETIN #3 (placing drive/path/filename information)
LINE12: Full Path to BULLETIN #4 (on these lines)
LINE13: Full Path to BULLETIN #5
LINE14: Full Path to BULLETIN #6
LINE15: Full Path to BULLETIN #7
LINE16: Full Path to BULLETIN #8
LINE17: Full Path to BULLETIN #9
LINE18: Full Path to BULLETIN #10
LINE19: Full Path to NEWSFILE
LINE20: NO
LINE #20 DEFINITION
File EXISTENCE checked?
(LEAVE BLANK TO IGNORE)
If you put a NO here, the existence of files on your
system will not be checked; therefore, the user will never get
a N/A filesize. This is handy if you have a CD-ROM drive
because seeking file existence is slow and can take a LONG
time. If you have a CD-ROM, I have been told(I don't have one)
that this MUST be set to NO. If you don't have one, just leave it
blank.
LINE21: 3
LINE #21 DEFINITION
Number of GOLD pieces given to a user for each uploaded message
through WWIVMail/QWK. Leave blank if you don't use GOLD on your
system or don't wish to reward the user. (You could also put 0
here if you wish).
LINE22: NO
LINE #22 DEFINITION
Add WWIVMail/QWK Tagline to all Uploaded Messages?
(LEAVE BLANK TO IGNORE)
This option is only valid if you are a registered WWIVMail/QWK
Sysop. This will tell WWIVMail/QWK NOT to add it's tagline to
the end of all uploaded messages. This is ON by default and
will continue to be active UNLESS you place a NO at line 22
of wwivmail.cfg.
I have added this feature because of several requests but, I would
really prefer that, after you register, you might be proud of
that fact and WANT to have the tagline say that you are registered.
The choice is yours. At least it's there!
LINE23: .QWK/.REP Packet Name..(Up to 8 ASCII Characters)
(LEAVE BLANK TO IGNORE)
The name of the .QWK packet for your BBS is created using the BBS
NAME field from your INIT.EXE(config.dat). The packet name is based
off of the first eight characters, with any blanks being replaced by
underscores.
Example: Das_tube.qwk
That's the whole configuration file, count the lines and get the number
of lines correct.
Start the BBS and go into //chainedit: Make it look just like this!
A. Description : WWIVMail/QWK v4.54 .QWK Mail Door
B. Filename : WWIVQWK.EXE
C. SL : 10 /* your choice */
D. AR : None. /* your choice */
E. ANSI : Optional
F. DOS Interrupt: NOT Used
G. 300 Baud : NOT Allowed /* your choice */
H. Shrink : Yes
I. Disable pause: No
Edit either AUTOEXEC.BAT or your BBS.BAT to include these three set commands;
set wwivmail=c:\wwiv\temp\ set dszlog=c:\wwiv\dszlog set dszport=1 /* put
the number of your active comport behind the = */
Now go into INIT.EXE and make sure that these are the command strings for
your PKWARE (ZIP) archive entries, make sure that you're using PKWARE version
204g. If you aren't your users reply packets might make a mess since the
latest version of pkware is version 204g;
PKZIP
PKUNZIP -v >NULL %1 < this is the list command using pkware v204g
pkunzip -e -o %1 %2
pkzip -a %1 %2
ARJ
arj l %1
arj e -jyn %1 %2
arj a %1 %2
LZH
lha l -m %1
lha a -m %1 %2
lha e %1 %2
That's it, just remember to create some bulletins and name those on the
correct lines in the WWIVMAIL.CFG file and inform your users that they need a
QWK packet reading utility like OLX-TD or SPEED130. OLX-TD is about as fully
operational as any begger-ware I've ever seen, it's also a fully configurable
and automated offline reader. I like it!
Other features such as source code or OS/2 compatibility information are
included in the wwivmail.doc file. If you have a modified userrec I've
included Michael Lieb's instructions below;
H) What Do I Do if I have a modified USERREC?
Although I have felt in the past that registered user's did have userrec
support, since they legally got the source code; but, some people couldn't
evaluate the product before paying for it. In order to fix this, and give my
product equal advantage with any competitor's (current or future),
WWIVMail/QWK can now be compiled and linked via an object-oriented approach to
match any userrec changes that you may have made. Any changes to the BBS file
structures, other then the userrec, however, will still require you to
register and get the source code. I hope by adding this feature that I will
have satisfied many of your needs and will have greatly enhanced the use,
compatibility and quality of the product.
REMINDER: You ONLY need to do this procedure if you have modified your
user.lst. If not, use the wwivqwk.exe included in this archive file. It was
made EXACTLY the same way as you are going to make yours using the
instructions below (except with a stock vardec.h)...I used the qwk.lib
included in this package just as you will!
Needed Files: ============= QWK.MAK MAKEFILE TO COMPILE AND LINK
WWIVQWK.EXE FROM QWK.LIB QWK.LIB WWIVMail/QWK LIBRARY TO LINK WITH USERREC.CPP
USERREC.H HEADER FILE FOR USERREC.CPP USERREC.CPP .CPP FILE TO COMPILE WITH
YOUR VARDEC.H AND LINK WITH QWK.LIB
Below is Michael Lieb's instructions to OS/2 users;
E) WWIVMail/QWK and OS/2 2.0-2.1
This information has been provided by:
The Doorman - The Thieves Market - (803) 723-7254 - 1@8301 WWIVNet
WWIWMail/QWK will run correctly under OS/2 if you keep these 2 things in mind:
1) Leave ALL COM PORT settings to their defaults, except, turn ON the COM_HOLD
toggle under the DOS Applications settings. (The default is OFF.)
2) Do NOT turn on COM_DIRECT_ACCESS..if you do, WWIV and the Network will lose
characters at high speeds, as will WWIVMail/QWK.
If you have any questions about these comments(or additions), please contact
The Doorman at the above address or send issue of them to me.
The Doorman - Thieves Market - (803) 723-7254 - 1@8302 WWIVNet
----- Instructions And Suggestions To Modders ------
If you choose, you may allow WWIVQWK access to your users immediately
after the users logon by adding the CALV002-C.MOD. You may also add one of my
mods, an updated Dr. Schizophrenic 1@6955 mod now called IMA001.MOD (this mod
creates an enforced post to call ratio over your chains), and when installed
with WWIVQWK.EXE and the CALV002-C.MOD it removes all of your user's lame
excuses for not posting.
I've included both of the above mentioned mods, which are fully
operational on Das' Tube BBS! located in lovely Redding California.
ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Mod Name : CALV02-C.MOD Mod Author: CALVIN 1@18262 WWIVLink і
і Difficulty : Ы±±±±±±±±± 1@10000 SnotLink і
і WWIV Version : 4.23 and WWIVMail/QWK v.4.53 1@2001 ASSnet і
і Mod Date : 12/07/93 1@8262 Apex і
і Files Affected: LILO.C 1@8265 WWIVNet і
і Description : Asks users if they'd like to use 1@63550 KILnet і
і WWIVMail/QWK right at logon 1@8262 TerraNET і
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДЩ
НН[ Description ]ННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННН
This mod will ask users "Would you like to use WWIVMail/QWK?" right after
they've been asked if they'd like to read their mail. This mod ignores
local logons.
Version C (this version) updates this mod for WWIV v.4.23 and
WWIVMail/QWK v.4.54.
НН[ Legend ]НННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННН
= Existing line - Do not change
+ Add this line
- Remove this line
НН[ Step 1 ]НННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННН
Back up your source code. I use the "incremental backup" procedure,
which utilizes the archive bit in the file attributes. If you want
info, read the PKZip docs or E-mail me. It works great and saves a lot
more time than just PKZIP BACKUP.ZIP *.H, etc.
НН[ Step 2 ]НННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННН
If YOU want the users to be asked to run WWIVMail/QWK at logon, install this.
The mod ignores a user in local (KB) logon.
Load up LILO.C and goto void logon(void)
Insert where noted
= if (usub[0].subnum==-1) {
= curconfsub=0;
= setuconf(CONF_SUBS, curconfsub, -1); /* this is the second place you'll see this line */
= }
= }
//The next block added for CALV02-C.MOD
if(incom){
prt(7,"Would you like to run WWIVMail/QWK? ");
if(yn()) {
sprintf(s1, "wwivqwk.exe %s", create_chain_file());
shrink_out(s1,1,0,1,1); /* call with chain.x path */
save_status();
}
}
//The above block added for CALV02-C.MOD
}
CALVIN 1@18262 WWIVLink
1@8265 WWIVNet
Insomnia BBS - Home of Platypus Programming /* end calv02-c.mod */
Mod Name: post_chn.mod or IMA001.MOD
Mod Author: Ima Moron 1@9661 (update of abondoned mod)
Version: WWIV version 4.23
Difficulty: Easy (read the mod author line again)
Files Affected: BBS.C and LILO.C
This mod was originally written by Dr. Schizophrenic 1@6955 for version
4.21, as time had gone by I (1@9661) have kept the mod up to date
through the version changes. The purpose of this mod is to force
your users to maintain their post to call ratio as you have set the
ratio in init.exe, or deny the user access to the online games. When
the user is denied access the mod will inform them why they were
denied chain access.
Code Legend:
/*==*/ = Existing Code as in WWIV version 4.23
/* There is an option to allow a new user "five free logons" if you choose, */
/* the drawback to this is that a high PTC ratio will catch up to a new */
/* user at their sixth logon. I run a PTC of 0.250 which is equivalent */
/* to one post to every four logons and the ratio doesn't seem to */
/* overload my new users although I give the free logons. */
!!Backup your source code!!
In BBS.C search for " case '.': " without the quotation marks. Delete
the old case '.': , then add this new case '.':
case '.': /* Begin of post_chain mod for BBS.C */
helpl=26;
if (thisuser.logons > 5) { /* Delete the line if you want immediate enforcement of the ratio */
if (!(thisuser.exempt & exempt_post))
if ((syscfg.post_call_ratio>0.0001) && (post_ratio()<syscfg.post_call_ratio)) {
nl();
nl();
sprintf(s,"1Your post/call ratio is2 %-5.3f1. You need a ratio of 2%-5.3f1 to play onliners.",
post_ratio(), syscfg.post_call_ratio);
pl(s);
nl();
return;
}
} /* Delete this line if you deleted the one above. */
write_inst(INST_LOC_CHAINS,0,INST_FLAGS_ONLINE);
existprint(get_string(1030));
do_chains();
break; /* End of post_chain mod for BBS.C */
/* Below is an optional screen print that the users will see at their */
/* sixth logon if you allowed the "five free logons" option, then at */
/* every logon there after, or at every logon if you omitted the "free */
/* logons option. Adding this code is optional, without it the user */
/* will see nothing different at logon. */
Go to LILO.C and search for ` instance ', in void logon(void).
Edit in the code between the existing code marked with /* == */
/* == */ npr("%s%d\r\n",get_string(1171),instance);
/* == */ nl();
nl(); /* start lilo.c post_chain mod code */
if (thisuser.logons > 5) { /* delete line if you want new users affected by the ratio */
if (thisuser.exempt & exempt_post)
prt(1,"2Your Post/Call Ratio :1 You are exempt from Post/Call ratios.");
if (!(thisuser.exempt & exempt_post))
npr("2Your Post/Call Ratio :1 %-5.3f2 System Requirement:1 %-5.3f",
post_ratio(), syscfg.post_call_ratio);
nl();
if (thisuser.exempt & exempt_ratio)
prt(1,"2Your Up/Dowload Ratio:1 You are exempt from Up/Download ratios.");
if (!(thisuser.exempt & exempt_ratio))
npr("2Your Up/Download Ratio:1 %-5.3f2 System Requirement:1 %-5.3f",
ratio(), syscfg.req_ratio);
nl();
nl();
} /* Remove if you want to hit new users with ratio, end lilo.c post_chain mod */
/* == */ if (thisuser.forwardusr) {
/* == */ if (thisuser.forwardsys) {
/* I made this edit on the first pass with no errors in my compile, if you */
/* have any trouble editing this code into your source code please contact */
/* me as 1@9661 WWIVNet or IceNET. */
---- Problems And Solutions For WWIVQWK ----
There are two common mistakes made when sysops install WWIVMAIL/QWK, the
first being that the sysop forgets to add the DSZ set commands which might
cause DSZ to loose the active comport if the BBS operates on a comport other
than com1. Secondly, WWIVQWK.EXE requires about two megs of disk space to
create the compressed message packet for the user. Michael Lieb advises you to
make sure that you have two megs of free space on the same drive as the BBS or
reset the TEMP directory variable with a set command in either your BBS.BAT or
AUTOEXEC.BAT files.
The second alternative of resetting the TEMP variable will cause
WWIVQWK.EXE to create the compressed packet on another drive and directory
than the TEMP subdirectory under the main BBS directory. This feature might be
advantageous to local network servers who handle many BBS network mail
deliveries.
The set command looks like this;
set TEMP=e:\temp\
WWIVQWK.EXE sends the message "aborting packet,insufficient disk space".
Well this message can be caused by two items, either your hard drive is full
therefore limiting QWK's packet forming ability or you have a bad copy of
PKZIP.EXE in the path someplace.
QWK initiates the download to the user but exits DSZ.EXE with code 1.
Think about it, if you're using a hacked copy of DSZ you need a newer version,
either this or your user(s) are using a hack of DSZ. If your users report bad
downloads from QWK find out which protocol they used, 9 out of ten times
you'll find that they are using Procomm+ Ymodem which isn't compatible with
true Ymodem Yam (DSZ.EXE).
Well other than this what can I say? Once you've added the utility I
believe that you'll love it. My users utilize QWK as often as they play Barren
Realms Elite.
ДДННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННННДД
ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
ДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДЩ S O F T W A R E / P R O G R A M M I N G АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Learning C - Part Four і Daarkhan (1@7676)
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДБДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
[Editor's Note: This is part four of the continuing Learning C series by
Daarkhan. While the series was originally planned to end with part four, two
additional parts have been acquired, allowing us to extend the feature. Part
five will appear in the June 1994 issue.]
FORWARD TO CHAPTER FOUR
Rather that continue with the old format of this tutorial (that is, where
I'd sit down and write for hours at a time making one big chapter) I'm going
to change it a bit. So that I can keep constantly giving you material to work
with, I'm going to tackle SMALLER topics. So while the chapters will be
smaller, they will (I promise) be released more frequently. This will make it
easier on both you and me (I won't have to write so long, and you won't have
to trudge through a HUGE tutorial, you can take your time and digest little
bits at a time).
FUNCTIONS!
Functions are, as Herbert Schildt puts it, "the building blocks of C."
You can think of words much like sentences in our English language. The words
(program statements) make up sentences (functions) which grouped together form
a paragraph (or story) which is the program itself.
Most other structured programming languages support the use of functions.
Turbo Basic calls them "subroutines," Modula-2 calls them "procedures," and
Pascal has an actual "function."
Put simply, a function is a piece of a program that performs some
operation or group of operations. These operations can work with the rest of
the program (or with other functions) or totally independent. We will see
examples of how to use functions shortly.
FUNCTIONS IN C
In C, the general form of a function is
return_value function_name (argument_list)
{
local_variable_declaration;
statements;
}
but we can look at only a generalized picture of it:
name()
{
statements;
}
So far, the only function we have used is main(), which must be found in
every C program you write. It is the function that is executed first upon the
start of your program.
A function's code begins following the opening brace '{' and ends with
the closing brace '}'. Remember that in C, braces set off LOGICAL BLOCKS. The
function's code is enclosed in one logical block. There can be more blocks
inside of each function. If this is confusing to you now, don't worry about
it. We'll dive deeper into this later.
Ok, now that we know what a function is, let's take a look at how one works.
/* Beginning of F1.C */
#include <stdio.h>
function1()
{
printf ("everyone");
}
main()
{
printf ("Hello ");
function1();
printf (" out there!");
}
/* End of F1.C */
Let's take a look at what that program does. The first thing to be
executed is the first printf() statement in the function main() [IMPORTANT:
remember that main() is ALWAYS the first function to be executed!]. Next,
function1() is called. So, follow with the program yourself and jump up to
function1(). The first (and only) statement in function1() is another printf()
statement. Then function1() exits and returns to execute the third and final
printf() statement, giving us the output:
Hello everyone out there!
See? Real easy. That's an example of how functions call other functions.
If this seems strange to you, don't worry. Practice makes perfect. Here is
another example. See if you can trace it.
/* Begining of F2.C */
#include <stdio.h>
p1()
{
printf("1");
}
p2()
{
p1();
printf("2");
}
main()
{
p2();
printf("3");
}
/* End of F2.C */
Can you guess what the output of this program is? Its:
123
Follow it with me... first main() is executed, which calls p2(). The
first statement in p2() is a call to p1(). p1() prints the "1" and returns
back to p2() which prints the "2" and returns to main(). main() then prints
the "3" and we're done.
See how easy it is to create functions that call other functions? Now
lets take a look at making functions return something.
FUNCTIONS AND RETURN VALUES
In C, functions can be used to represent any simple data type. Remember
those? (void, int, char, float, double, etc.) Every function in C can return a
value to its caller. The way we do this is by specifying the type of data the
function returns.
Now remember that special data type, void. Void simply means that we
don't care about any value for that function. So far, all of the functions we
have used to date could have been specified as void functions because we
weren't using return values.
Ok, let's take a look at a simple program which returns a value to the caller.
/* Beginning of F3.C */
#include <stdio.h>
int function()
{
return(3);
}
void main()
{
int my_int;
my_int = function();
printf ("%i", my_int);
}
/* End of F3.C */
Ok, this may be a little more complicated to trace, but let's give it a
shot. First, main() is executed. Inside main() [NOTE: see how main() was
declared as a void function because we don't care what it returns] we have the
local variable my_int which is an integer. The next statement assigns a value
to my_int, but in order to get that value, the computer has to first execute
the function() to get it, and then the printf() statement prints out a "3".
Let's take a look at function(). See the return() statement. The return()
is used in C to have a function exit to it's caller. If the function is
declared as non-void, you may return a value of the declared type to the
caller. If you declare your function as non-void and DON'T have a return
value, your compiler will most likely issue you a warning. You can use return
in a void function, to exit. No value is returned, however.
Here, our function is useless. We could just as well substitute the 3
into our printf() statement and save ourselves a lot of trouble. So let's take
a look at a function that returns a meaningful value, the square root of a
number. It's located in the header file math.h, so we have to remember to
#include it.
/* Beginning of F4.C */
#include <stdio.h>
#include <math.h>
void main()
{
double answer;
answer = sqrt(10.0);
printf ("%f", answer);
}
/* End of F4.C */
See, by running this program, how sqrt() returns the square root of 10.0
to be placed in the variable answer. (Remember to include the decimal point).
FUNCTION ARGUMENTS
An argument is sometimes called a parameter in other languages. It is
basically data that is sent TO a function to be use in the function's
operations. For example, take a look at this function:
void print_product (int x, int y)
{
printf ("&d", x * y);
}
This function, called print_product(), takes two arguments (each an
integer) and displays their product. We can call print_product() from a
program like:
void main()
{
print_product (5, 6);
print_product (12, 2);
print_product (2, 4);
}
and receive the outputs 30, 24, and 8, respectively. It is worthwhile to
note that if you don't intend on your function taking any arguments, it's
argument list should be declared as void. For example, in the previous
example,
we could have declared main() as
void main (void)
{
...
}
This is how professionally written C programs are constructed, and this
will be the convention I shall use in the future.
Ok, so here's an example of a short program that takes arguments AND
gives a return value:
/* Beginning of F5.C */
#include <stdio.h>
int sum (int a, int b)
{
return (a+b);
}
void main (void)
{
printf ("1 + 3 is %i \n", sum(1,3));
printf ("5 + 7 is %i \n", sum(5,7));
printf ("10 + 28 is %i \n", sum(10,28));
}
/* End of F5.C */
This program produces the output:
1 + 3 is 4
5 + 7 is 12
10 + 28 is 38
You trace it. Enter it into your computer and run it. Make sure you
understand completely how it works. If you don't send Email to me and let me
know what you don't understand.
ASSIGNMENTS
1. Enter, compile, and run all of the programs contained in this
chapter.
2. Create a program to display "C is a fun language" which uses
calls to at least 3 functions.
3. Create a function called difference() which takes two integers
as arguments and returns their difference. Use the following
prototype:
int difference (int a, int b);
NEXT
The if() statement.
SOURCES
Downing, Douglas. Dictionary of Computer Terms. New York:
Barrons, 1989.
Holzner, Steven. C Programming: The Accessible Guide to
Professional Programming. New York: Brady, 1991.
Schildt, Herbert. Teach Yourself C. Berkeley: Osborne
McGraw-Hill, 1990.
---. Turbo C/C++: The Complete Reference. Berkeley: Osborne
McGraw-Hill, 1990.
Coming next month, Chapter Five.
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і Artificial Intelligence - Part 1 і Louie (6@1)
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Artificial Intelligence is a growing field within the computer sciences.
It encompasses many hopes and dreams of what computer technology has to offer
the world. It also encompasses many fears of what computers and robotics will
do to the world.
But what is AI? That is a very difficult question to answer. It involves
answering some other questions that we really cannot answer yet. Questions
like:
1) What is Intelligence?
2) Can a machine think?
3) If so, can it think like a human being or will the thinking process
involved be fundamentally different.
4) What will it do for, or maybe to, human beings.
Lots of other questions I could think up as well if I wanted to sit here
and think about it for a little while. Most of these questions are
unanswerable in any definitive way. First, nobody is sure what intelligence
is. Does a machine that looks like it is intelligent really qualify as being
intelligent, or is it just obeying simple commands and doing a good imitation
of intelligence? See what I mean?
The father of Computer Science and Artificial Intelligence was Alan
Turing. He was a brilliant and innovative mathematician. He helped in
designing one of the first computers ever to be built. He wrote many papers
that are still used for the ideas he expressed in them. Turing said "A machine
has artificial intelligence when there is no discernible difference between
the conversation generated by the machine and that of an intelligent person."
This has been used as the practical definition of AI by many since the
time Turing first expressed this thought in 1950. Why? Couldn't it just be a
good imitation? Yes, it could be just an imitation of true intelligence; but
how do you know that the people around you that you consider intelligent are
not just real good imitations? There is probably no final word on whether
something or somebody is intelligent or not. So, you've a practical definition
in absence of an absolute.
The test that is implicit in Turing's definition is called the "Turing
Test" in his honor. So far, no computer or electronic machine has ever passed
the Turing Test. There have been some very good imitations so far, but all
have had limits on them that make it apparent. After some observation of the
output for some time, it becomes a rather simple task to figure out that it is
a computer. Some take longer than others, but all have failed in the end.
Mankind has always dreamed of Artificial Intelligence, even before the
term to express the dream had been invented. Greek mythos had Hephaestus who
fashioned human-like figures regularly in his forge. Aphrodite brought
Galactea - a man-made woman, to life.
Medieval Christians had the legend of Pope Sylvester II, who was credited
with building a talking head that answered questions about the future.
Medieval European Jews had Rabbi Judah ben Loew who created the Golem out of
clay. The Jewish legend ends, however, with the Golem having to be dismantled
because it got out of control. This may be the first instance of "Technology
is bad" or "Man was not meant to know certain things" ideas. Author Mary
Shelley took large parts of the Rabbi ben Loew myth for her novel
"Frankenstein," first published in 1818.
The 20th Century saw the rise of science fiction as a legitimate form of
literature. With it, came Isaac Asimov and his "Three Laws of Robotics". This
was a practical approach to robots (Which are just computers that can walk
around, aren't they? C3PO from "Star Wars" and Data from "Star Trek: The Next
Generation" are examples of robots as I am thinking of them here. I am not
thinking of those industrial machines that move around a little.)
The three laws of robotics are:
First Law: A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction allow
a human being to come to harm.
Second Law: A robot must obey the orders given to it by a human being except
where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
Third Law: A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection
does not conflict with the First or Second Law.
(Note: Isaac Asimov always gave credit for the Three Laws to John W. Campbell,
Jr. But Campbell always said they were Asimov's. Asimov ended up with
the copyright so he gets the credit. Besides, the laws were used in
stories written by Isaac Asimov.
Asimov's approach to computers and robotics involved built-in safeguards
to protect human beings from their own creations accidentally causing them
harm. This is the opposite of the basic moral of Frankenstein or the Rabbi ben
Loew legend. Intelligent computers won't be able to harm humans because they
will be sophisticated enough to allow for built-in safeguards. This does not
mean one couldn't build them without built-in safeguards, but why would any
person take a chance like that? Only terrorists and madmen would even attempt
it, in my opinion. Militaries might narrow down the basic definition, but even
they will leave safeguards in for most practical matters. Nobody wants their
own machine turning on them when it can be avoided.
So, I am against the Doomsday Sayers as to what Artificial Intelligence
will bring. Computers will not be turning on their masters. Not without the
masters screwing up big time first, anyway.
Probably the two most important names in AI other than Turing are those
of John McCarthy and Marvin Minsky. McCarthy is the inventor of the LISP
programming language. Minsky has done much work on organization and
representation of knowledge.
LISP is the big-name programming language in the AI field. Of the 100
most important artificial intelligence research programs ever written,
probably 95 of them were written in LISP. The others were probably either
written before LISP came around in 1958, or were written in Prolog, a recent
language to come around and still not widely used in the United States.
LISP stands for LISt Processing. It is an interpreted language, which
means each program statement isn't looked at seriously until run-time. To use
LISP you have to think recursively. A recursive function includes itself as
part of its own definition. A LISP sees no difference between the program and
the data being acted upon.
Prolog, though, (a recent newcomer to the field of AI relative to LISP),
has gained a small following now. Prolog stands for PROgramming in LOGic. It
uses predicate calculus techniques in attempting to prove the truth of
propositions from a set of axioms.
Neither LISP or Prolog is much like the normal programming languages
BBSers would know - like C, Pascal, Basic, Fortran, COBOL, etc. Neither LISP
nor Prolog is a structured programming language.
The most famous program Artificial Intelligence has given the world is
ELIZA. ELIZA was developed by Joseph Weizebaum in the mid-1960's at MIT. ELIZA
simulates a Rogerian therapist; you can conduct a conversation with ELIZA just
as you might with a psychiatrist. ELIZA was a first attempt to see if a
computer could pass the Turing Test. ELIZA used basic trickery in an attempt
to appear human. It would look for key words in the conversation and turn
around statements made by you into questions.
Here is an example of a conversation of an ELIZA with a person. (CAPS is
ELIZA)
HOW ARE YOU TODAY?
Fine. Men are all alike.
IN WHAT WAY?
They're always bugging us about something or other.
CAN YOU THINK OF A SPECIFIC EXAMPLE?
Well, my boyfriend made me come here.
YOUR BOYFRIEND MADE YOU COME HERE?
He says I'm depressed most of the time.
I'M SORRY TO HEAR YOU ARE DEPRESSED.
It's true. I am unhappy.
DO YOU THINK COMING HERE WILL HELP YOU NOT TO BE UNHAPPY?
I need some help, that much seems certain.
WHAT WOULD IT MEAN TO YOU IF YOU GOT SOME HELP?
See how impressive that ELIZA program can be. It looks almost intelligent
at first glance. But when you look at it you can see it just latched on to
what the person interfacing with it said and turned the input around into
questions most of the time. ELIZA would also look for keywords like
"boyfriend," "mother," "father," and "death," etc. etc. If the program would
be giving intelligent responses it couldn't really turn input around. It would
understand what the person typing with it meant when she said it was her
boyfriend who made her talk to ELIZA and wouldn't ask a generic question like
"YOUR BOYFRIEND MADE YOU COME HERE?"
ELIZA did not demonstrate real understanding or intelligence. It was a
very good first attempt to try and pass the Turing Test and is still studied
today because it is easy to draw up a simple ELIZA program and play with it.
When I was in my second year College LISP class, it was the first programming
project assigned to us. We had to design an ELIZA of our own. Now, what I
wrote was functionally stupid but it was a fun project and many of the basic
concepts of AI (if not all of them) are part of it.
The major areas Artificial Intelligence research has divided itself into
are: Expert Systems, Natural Language Processing, Symbolic Processing, Problem
Solving (Mathematical proof solving), Pattern Recognition, Robotics, Machine
Learning, and Appearing Human.
In the second installment of this series, I will try to provide a rough
overview of each of these areas.
BIBLIOGRAPHY
Understanding Artificial Intelligence; 1988; by Henry C. Mishkoff;
Howard W Sams.
Artificial Intelligence... Using C; 1987; by Herbert Schildt;
Osborne McGraw-Hill.
The Computer Glossary: The Complete Desk Reference; 1991; by Alan
Freedman; AmaCom.
Using Turbo Prolog; 1988; by Kelly M. Rich & Phillip R. Robinson;
Borland-Osborne McGraw-Hill.
I, Robot; 1950; by Isaac Asimov; Del Rey.
Asimov On Science; 1989; by Isaac Asimov; Pinnacle. Essays entitled
"Thinking About Thinking" and "More Thinking About Thinking".
AI: The Tumultuous History of the Search for Artificial Intelligence;
1993; by Daniel Crevier; BasicBooks.
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і Isn't It Great Being A Sysop? і Louhal (1@10)
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Let me start off by saying that I have had a wonderful time being a WWIV
Sysop. Having The Forest BBS up has bought me many hours of pleasure and have
affected my meeting many people to begin with.
The other day a user invoked the chat call. This user, who we will just
call Author Annoyance, just wanted to chat. I don't mind chatting with Author,
but he does like to ramble.
"Louhal, I've been meaning to ask you," like every other question he
starts out with. He goes on "You must love being a Sysop, the job must be
fabulous, I wish I could do it." Well in thinking I started to frown a bit
because this person must have no life outside of weekly trips to Venus. He
must not have really thought about that one.
In thinking back, I remember The Forest's start. First, after being
thrown from about every BBS in Western New York for [file] Leeching, I was fed
up. I would start up my own board. In choosing the kind of software I thought
it would be easy. HAH! 300 different kinds and no help from any author. Heck,
even Wayne himself is almost unreachable except those little dominions that
shell him lots of registration fees and worship his greatness <grin>. I could
have searched for months. A friend told me to write my own, but that would
have taken years! No, WWIV was the Best out the bunch. Actually, it was the
only one that virtually asked no questions and installed itself.
Next, there came external protocols and doors. Those awful,
mind-degrading doors. I remember raiding all that I could to find doors and
calling the countryside to download. After counting the change left over from
Ma Bell's long distance hit, I finally had enough to register Tradewars. Those
annoying UNREGISTERED signs and short frills on customization make you really
go head-long to do that.
Next, came the modem. The old 300 baud just didn't attract users like it
should have. Upgrading to 2400 took a little stinch of cash, but I didn't feel
satisfied till I got the 14.4. I mean, those teen boppers won't call unless
they can play those onliners and crash your board in only 30 minutes.
Then came the name. I was into conservation when I started this thing and
so the name The Forest came to mind. To be honest, conservation was cheaper
and I could have bought one already with the amount of cash I had put into
this thing. My users probably are laughing now at the name, but it was mine
and who cares if they call. Besides me...
After carefully installing the board - well, messing up a few times - I
came to the conclusion I needed help. A wonderful friend of mine had a great
suggestion: read the docs. Well, let me tell you, after Einstein woke up from
the punch, he will never make that suggestion again. But after carefully
reading the docs, I had installed and set the board up and was almost ready
for business.
One important aspect about a board is security. In thinking about it, you
can do it in two ways. Open it up and turn the trashers and hackers loose or
make yourself a little electronic Fort Knox. In choosing the loosely guarded
way, I stood the chance of having the drive reformatted every 20 mins. The
Fort Knox approach meant one caller every 20 days for lack of being able to do
anything. I chose the more secure way because the purchase of the modem meant
no tape backup. Oh well, doesn't account for much now since I have a backup
and don't use it.
Well, after all was set up, I waited for callers. I had the phone line
put in and posted the number on every board in existence. Why aren't they
calling? After calling the board from a friend's house, I found out about that
stupid INIT string thing. Well, a week went by and after finally getting one
that worked, I got a caller. BBS Buster from everywhere USA. Well, it took
Buster about 10 mins to post that the board was dirt and I was worst. He
posted all over not to call The Forest unless you want to step in Forest Doo.
Well, I deleted him and got that little satisfaction. Next, I meet this guy
named Jim. He calls up and says join his net. Well, I ignored him the first
time, but he got me to say yes. Well, this bug-eyed weasel wanted the board up
now! We worked half of the night to get it up. Some kid on the other end
(ICEFREEZER) suggested reading the docs. Twenty minutes later, after he got up
(did I mention there was a quality about Jim I liked?), we we got the dang
thing to recognize the network. Now I can call myself a sysop.
Back to Mr. Annoyance. How could what I went through be so great? I
immediately dropped chat and kicked him off. That reminds me to drop over and
properly low level format his drive.
When thinking back, always remember, you probably wouldn't do it again!
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і How I Started In BBSing - Part Two і Louie (6@1)
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Hi, there. A few months back IceNEWS ran a story about how some of the
IceNEWS Staff, Random (Wayne Bell) and Filo all got started being involved in
BBSing. We got some nice feedback about the article and therefore set off to
do, just like a "Star Indy Jones Wars of Trek" film; a sequel.
I went around and asked a bunch of folks if they would be willing to
write short pieces about how they got involved in BBSing. Got four nice
responses from Deanna, #1 @8407, Daryl, #1 @5900, Jim, #1 @1, and Toadress #2
@3461.
Deanna is the fun loving babe of WWIVlink fame. Daryl is from the 509
Area Code, aka: The Area Code from Hell!! Jim was ordered to write by the
IceNEWS staff or we would kill him and replace him with a stooge to do the
IceNEWS Staff bidding. Something we are still considering I might add.
Toadress was amazed that we would ask her to write for IceNEWS. Still don't
know why? I was amazed that four people consented to write for lowly ol'
IceNEWS.
Anyway, I think this is all very, very interesting. Please read on.
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Deanna #1 @8407
In 1988, I was working for Virginia Power, in the Information Center,
when one of the staff first started a company BBS. Another employee soon
converted the BBS to WWIV, which was version 4.05 at the time. I had a modem,
and called the BBS often. Then some of the Information Center was demolished,
and I offered to take over sysoping the BBS. The employee who had found WWIV
for us taught me a few basics, and gave me the number of a few local WWIV
BBS's to call for further help. Within weeks I was hooked on WWIV BBSing. In
those days, I did all my BBS calling from work, whenever I could spare the
time. I didn't even own a PC of my own.
I was laid off from Virginia Power in 1989, but being addicted to BBSing
by that time, I used my unemployment checks to buy a PC and modem, so I could
support my habit. In December 1989, I met MTB (then Moribund the
Burgermeister, now Midnight Tree Bandit) at a BBS party. He had been a WWIV
sysop for a few years by then, and had just moved back to Richmond from a
self-imposed exile in the country, where his Rappahannock Vaporboard BBS had
had only a few callers. He had a BBS ready for Richmond, but no place to live
at the time. I offered the new Vaporboard a place to live on my PC (MTB had to
find his own apartment....), and it moved there in early January, 1990. The
Sisterhood sub was born that same month, out of my fledgling friendship with
Ebony Eyes, the "founder" of WWIVLink, and our mutual hopes to bring more
women into WWIV BBSing.
A few weeks later (February 1990), the WWIVLink split from WWIVnet
occurred, and the Vaporboard went to WWIVLink, and so did MTB and I. The
Sisterhood became the WWIVLink Sisterhood (and it still flourishes today!) By
April, MTB had named me the #1 at the Vaporboard as I was doing all the
administrative work. Later that year, I was voted AC for 804 WWIVLink, and the
following year I was elected the Eastern Time Zone ZC for Link. It was during
that year that I "met" Jim, 1@1 IceNET, when he applied to Link for a node.
Since then I've done a year's stint as WWIVLink's national Vote Coordinator,
and added nodes in WWIVnet, PIN, FemmeNet and now IceNET, the latter mostly
due to Jim's urging and MTB's, er, encouragement...:). I'm very pleased with
what I've seen of IceNET so far, and hope to stay here a long time.
Now if you want the un-expurgated version, you're going to have to get an
account on the Vaporboard, where you'll be in GREAT company: 1@8407 IceNET,
1@18407 WWIVLink, 1@8408 WWIVnet, 1@8 PIN, 1@8408 FemmeNet - 804-730-3340.
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Daryl #1@5900
In the early 80's my girlfriend and I purchased a Tandy computer for
purposes of dealing with the plethora of writing required in graduate school,
my knowledge of DOS was so limited that at one it was a blessing that I had no
hard drive and loaded PFS Write from floppy. Years later I ended up acquiring
the same computer as she was about to take off for Columbia and had received a
grant for a laptop. I bought a modem in 1988 and called the only BBS in the
county, a nasty cryptic thing that left me with the impression that there was
some mainframe computer with different rooms and doors within it. I called
systems in the local largest city, however my first $500 phone bill put an end
to that, however I was left with the impression that WWIV was severely
populated with rude children.
Later I moved into the city again for law school in 1990. I was ecstatic
as all those toll charges were going to be local calls. I ended up downloading
Maximus and after three days of struggling asked a local WWIV SysOp for a copy
of WWIV, needless to say I was up and running in about 15 minutes. I came to
understand that WWIV is not severely populated with rude children, but that
I'd stumbled into several "last for a month" type systems run by children.
Now, a mere four years later I have a small 3 station LAN running, a
consulting company which specializes in automating law firms, and a multi-line
BBS and a grant pending with the federal government to create a national legal
research database for Indian Law Research. The BBS learning curve is indeed
short isn't it?
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Jim #1 @1
At first I thought BBS's were a pain actually. I'd called a few PCBOARD
types, and the navigation was quite confusing to me. I'd been calling a few
pay services like CI$, and spending a LOT of money doing so...but thought it
was enjoyable and interesting to visit the CB channels and chat with total
strangers for hours on end.
My first machine with a modem was a TRS Model 100, and my first computer
a TRS 80 Model 1. The modem in the model 100 was a superfast 300 baud, though
I could also use slower baud rates. I was amazed at the time since the screen
writes to the 40x7 LCD screen were faster than I could type.
My first real computer experience was on mini-computers in the 60's and
early 70's before there were PC's. Programming was done via front panel
switches. A bootstrap program was toggled in one line at a time, until you had
about 40 lines of code. Then the computer was smart enough to allow input from
an ASR-33 teletype machine. My first program was one that alphabetized a list
of 10 characters. The program was saved to paper tape, which was the fastest
means of off line storage then (faster than punch cards).
I got my first IBM compatible PC in about 1985, with a 2400 baud modem,
and by 1989 or so had decided that CI$ was just too expensive. Icefreezer
asked me in chat on a pay system if I wanted to start a BBS, I said YES, and
that night we installed WWIV. I was awed at the program, and quickly put up
the BBS on my voice line (which I ran 24 hours a day for about 4 months).
Soon I was interested in trying out the WWIV network software. I'd never
even see a WWIVnet bbs at that time, so Icefreezer convinced NorthStar to put
up a bbs, and we networked the two. I'll never forget the amazement I felt
when I sent email to myself on NorthStar's system (IceNET @2), then called
there to read my note. I was hooked, IceNET began, the rest is history.
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Toadress #2 @3461
No one will believe me, but it's true. Toadress was drug kicking and
screaming to a computer keyboard. I did NOT want to learn how to use a
computer. It was, and for the most part still is, Hubby's domain. I had no
use, nor time, for a computer in my life.
Sometime in 1987, our dear friend came over and between him and hubby,
the two of them dragged me downstairs to the computer. "You have to TRY this".
So I was indoctrinated into the world of a bulletin board. The first board I
was on was called simply "Link" It was a computer in our local PBS station. I
think it had something like 4 phone lines running into it. Poor John Holste
(the sysop and a Vice President at Channel 9) had to put up with me bumbling
around his board.
And BUMBLE I did. I was such a novice at it that I had to call Toad (aka
Tom) at work to figure out how to turn off the computer! I would get totally
lost on the board. Luckily, the system was in the sysop's office, so he had
chat on most of the time. I would ring desperately to get directions on how to
go from one place to another. He had his hands full.
But within a month, I was hooked. I had three children at home, all under
the age of 10. The computer allowed me to talk to ADULTS! And not only TALK to
them, I got to explore new ideas and places. The board was populated by not
only myself, but college professors who tried ever so gently to stretch
everyone's minds. We had some wonderful conversations. As I said, I was
hooked.
As time went on, the board evolved. The person who was writing this
particular software (sorry techies, I don't know what type it was) was
refining it. We were a beta test site. With each upgrade, here was this woman
screaming at John... BUT THIS won't work.. Why can't I do THAT anymore? And
believe it or not, John found out that *I* somehow was finding the bugs within
the software with my bumbling. We decided it was because I was NOT a techie
type that I was finding where the weak points of the software were. They
actually appreciated my input. I seemed to ask the questions that would point
out some deficiency that they wanted to fix (to save their software!!! -g-).
For a year I enjoyed the Channel 9 LINK and all who inhabited that little
spot of cyberspace. Then due to funding difficulties (what PBS station doesn't
have that?) we were told our unique little club would have to close. I was
DESPERATE. How to keep my new found friends???
Well, John suggested that I try a WWIV board. He gave me a few numbers to
try and after much coaxing (I don't take change too well) I did go ahead and
call a WWIV board. The board was called "The Dark Side of the Moon" run by
Matt and Celeste Henry. POOR CELESTE!!! I think I must have sent her the
LONGEST Validation letter on record!! I had my whole life history in it. I
really wanted to be validated, and unlike the LINK, this was a non paying
board. At Channel 9 as long as you were a PBS supporter, you could LINK. Here
I was on my own. Luckily, Celeste took pity on me, and we started the WHOLE
learning process over again!
I got most of the LINK folks to join Celeste's board. Once again, we had
a nice happy family atmosphere. I was such a talker (ain't' I?) that I was
invited to join other boards. One was Boardwalk, where Ebony Eyes was, and
another was Radical's Retreat. All the time learning that there were multiple
viewpoints on a LOT of things that I had thought there was only ONE
viewpoint..mine... BOY did I learn *I* was wrong!! I think that is what has
kept me BBSing all this time. The people. I will honestly say that a day on
the BBS doesn't go by with out me learning some new fact.
Toad Hall came about when sysops around St. Louis needed someplace to
play Tradewars without being called a cheat. Toad was completely absorbed by
Tradewars at the time, so he set up the board strictly for the game. We
invited all the sysops we knew to come and play the game. It was a private
board for almost a year.
But, as all things do, we've evolved. We went with WWIVnet at first
because it had two things. One was a flat $5.00 monthly fee for a dedicated
server, and, two, because it had the Gary and Mary Ann Martin-hosted Tradewars
sub (I told you he was addicted)!
When the Mod became available to have two boards on ONE computer, we
thought we'd died and gone to heaven. Ozz set us up as an end node off his
board and we were LINK'ed once again. Then WWIV changed and we could have
MULTIPLE nodes..and we became an IceNET node. (cause Ice is NICE)
I have gone from a VERY reluctant computer user to someone who BBS's in
total decadence (on a laptop in the recliner). My daughter is now starting to
BBS, and the boys want to know when THEY can BBS. I keep telling them they
have to learn how to read first! But I can see that the whole family will be
participating in Cyberspace soon enough..then I'll have to go somewhere else
for some peace and quiet! (grin) Perhaps I'll take up Embroidery again....
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Those were all very interesting. We found out that: 1.) Deanna started
bbsing before she found a computer of her own. 2.) Daryl inherited his
computer from a girlfriend. 3.) At one time, Jim hated BBSing (but, then,
PCBoard can do that to a person). And lastly, but not least, 4.) Toadress was
dragged kicking and screaming into this wonderful culture of ours.
Sometimes I wonder if BBSing Culture really is inspired by sicko LSD
trips... but then, lets all enjoy the ride while it lasts.
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і The Adventures of ModemMan! і Jots (1@7850) & Deacon Blues (2@7653)
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДБДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
Editor's note: This is the final chapter of the four-part serial
"The Adventures Of ModemMan!"
"In the not-so-distant future, a Top-Secret government experiment goes
awry. A computer-geek with the intelligence of a doorknob is accidentally
transformed mentally and physically by a combination of science, medicine,
technology, and dumb luck. The result: the world's first LIVING COMPUTER...
ModemMan! Disguised as Joe Modem, a mild-mannered sysop of a small electronic
bulletin board service in a large metropolitan city, ModemMan fights a
neverending battle with the sinister forces of evil to protect the world,
bringing truth, justice, and a higher transfer rate to all..."
The Adventures of
M o d e m M a n !
"Insufficient Memory"
Chapter 4: "DEL BOOLEAN*.*"
In our last chapter, our hero ModemMan had his Tool Kit taken by V.T.
Killer, thus stripping him of his ModemMan abilities. As Joe Modem, he is
forcibly taken - along with Pronto, his sidekick and co-sysop - to a secret
laboratory. There, Joe renews his acquaintance with the evil Dr. Boolean, his
former employer and creator of the Penultimate chip - the neural-enhancing
implant that is the main source of ModemMan's power. Through Boolean's
recollection of the incident which accidentally turned Joe Modem into ModemMan
instead of Boolean, he makes clear his intention to regain the Penultimate
chip from Joe's brain, but not until he's had some fun first. For instance, by
strapping our hero into a machine that pumps line noise directly into his
cerebral cortex, for starters...
Ћз3Пќ’"нµзюМй3юfиЏЦс&iтыЯEЇ‹бо[EtтЬНЙyййуњпк§ЦВ*еIUпP‰Щ(—ж»hSpгZV8’щ‹‹
?ЭЕЇE>*ќH"йЙЊёВпЏЅ+0'•©—wѓ3¶Ў`џ†ЙwҐ©Хжg#NWуc&чЌЦl¶±ѕКl5kaУЬйp™(oL»Ч“xeЁЊБг‘\
Joe Modem could barely make out the image of Dr. Boolean laughing
hysterically. The line noise Boolean was jacking into him was too much.
;ожМьIЖљЮWЫ№„БеmiЗ.fOыф<њбН†uFХОlА;W/„ЉФГ¦ЇзЃЈЙњЇЄн’ЅпЛйыъN0_р-Є¤qрЗ?G|
Юѕдx?Wsiyљ…sычЎ":1&Єј`З®eЅь№?ћ¦‹3эСД0#,b°Уq’ОZІмщј‘3џн7Мh„ЂkW,Гo№“Qђ°І#Гp p
:K/0qюR7$2A5%sЎ;QJB§yщ1Q¬k:!Ъ`КЛЇРАЖЃђ †єРОгћ#ЫФї#К•rйНґµ3[uU‹ыЅ%5”RmЕшрZ3н}:
"OK, Ray," said Boolean. "You can turn it off now."
Joe breathed a sigh of relief when he heard that. The line noise
immediately ceased and the clasps around ModemMan's hands and feet were
released. Joe got up slowly and stood rather shakily, still disoriented.
"Well, ModemMan," said Boolean, "I trust you're feeling a bit better now,
eh?" Joe nodded weakly. "I'm glad to hear it," continued the demented
scientist as he led Joe to another technological contraption of his. "Now, let
me introduce you to another of my favorite inventions I call 'It.'"
'It,' as it was called, seemed to be another chair-like apparatus, this
time with a head restraint and many more wires coming out of It. All of the
wires appeared to feed into a DIN-style plug and a serial interface.
"OK, but what's it called?" asked ModemMan, apparently still not fully
recovered from the recent barrage of binary bilge given to him by Boolean.
"Imbecile," sneered Boolean. "The machine is called `It,' you moron!"
Boolean shook his head in disgust. "I see my chip didn't add anything to your
IQ level." Boolean led Joe to the front of It. "In fact, I'm going to conduct
an experiment on that right now. Why don't you have a seat, ModemMan," smirked
Boolean as V.T. and Blue Ray stepped up behind him. "It's the best seat in the
house. Hahaha."
Joe warily sat down and leaned back. This time, however, there were no
clasps to hold his feet and hands. As Joe regained his senses, he noticed that
Pronto was seated in an adjacent chair just like his. The major difference
seemed to be that the headgear had been modified to allow for the lack of
built-in interfaces that ModemMan had. The two were connected by a thick,
black cable. Blue Ray positioned himself by the control panel of the machine.
Dr. Boolean then proceeded to insert some of the wires into ModemMan's special
surgically-implanted DIN socket and serial port.
Boolean smiled and said, "Don't worry, ModemMan. This won't hurt any more
than I want it to." He then signaled to Ray to start up the machine.
The room went black as the machine started up and Joe soon found himself
in a deep Virtual Reality trance. Joe could hear Boolean saying, "You see,
ModemMan, this machine will simply put you in a VR state and you'll just have
to pass through my little, uhh... VR maze that I put together for you. Enjoy!
Hahahha!"
As Blue Ray flipped the main switch, ModemMan entered the VR world. He
appeared to be in a darkened corridor with a single light source illuminating
something ahead of him. As he moved closer. MM could see a huge door with a
sign on it that read 'It' in big letters. He slowly advanced towards the door
and it opened inward. As he stepped inside, the door quickly closed behind
him.
A computer monitor materialized in the Virtual air in front of ModemMan
came towards him. The monitor held the image of Dr. Boolean. The image spoke
to MM.
"Welcome, ModemMan, to 'It.' Here's where we see if the Penultimate chip
did indeed manage to boost a person's IQ as it was designed to do. I figure if
it works on a loser like you, it should do wonders for someone who already
possesses something that passes for intelligence. Someone like me, for
instance."
The image of Boolean continued speaking. "If you want to get out of here
alive, you'll have to pass a few obstacles. Pretty simple ones, mind you,
since one can't expect a masterpiece when working with flawed material, but
very real ones nonetheless, with very real consequences for failure. Oh, and
by the way, we'll be watching your progress out here. Have fun!" The monitor
then promptly vanished.
ModemMan looked around. He was presented with four directions to choose
from. Gee, he thought, if Pronto were here he could help me decide. MM
wondered why Pronto had been wired into a device similar to the one he was in
now and what Pronto was going through there. Joe decided to do the old
'Eeney-Meeney-Miney-Moe' and picked a door.
The door swung open outward unexpectedly, hitting MM flat on the face as
he approached. Gotta watch out for them doors, he thought making a mental note
of it. Looking around, he saw that it was a dead end room, with the only way
out the same way he came in. As he turned to leave, ModemMan saw something
materialize in front of him. It was a mouse. Not of the rodent variety, but of
the computer type. And it also seemed to be alive, as it was wiggling its
"tail" cord.
The mouse suddenly coiled its tail and pounced on ModemMan, landing with
its tail cord draped over MM's shoulder and its body hanging limply down his
back. The cord then whipped around MM's neck and began coiling itself around
his throat like a python trying to squeeze the life out of him. While MM
struggled with the tail cord, the body of the mouse transformed, gaining a
mouth, complete with a set of teeth. The mouse body quickly put them use by
sinking them into MM's posterior region.
ModemMan let loose a howl of agony as he quickly hopped out of the room
and tore the tail cord free of his neck. The tail cord then proceeded to wrap
itself around MM's arm as he desperately reached back to free his fanny from
the bite of the mouse body. Grabbing it and freeing his arm from the tail
cord, MM swung the mouse around by its tail cord several times to gain
momentum before releasing it. The mouse went flying through the air to shatter
against one of the doors in front of MM. The impact knocked the door ajar and
it swung open inwardly, revealing Pronto standing in a circle of light. Pronto
then began walking towards MM.
ModemMan called out to him. "Pronto! There you are! Get over here, I want
to talk to you." Pronto apparently didn't hear ModemMan and he walked right
past him. "Hey, get back here! Where are you going?"
Joe ran after Pronto and pulled him to a halt. His eyes were glazed and
he seemed to be in a trance,as he was chanting "Destroy JM... Destroy JM..."
JM, thought ModemMan, who could that be. As he was pondering over the fateful
question he failed to notice Pronto pulling out a gun and pointing it at him.
ModemMan decided to ask Pronto who this JM person was. He turned around only
to find himself staring down the barrel of an X-21,Smith & Wesson's latest
creation. He then realized what the JM stood for: Joe Modem.
"Pronto! What's wrong with you? It's me, your old pal and compadre, Joe!"
Pronto motioned for Joe to back up against the wall. "Hey,Pronto, you aren't
going to shoot me, are you? Hey, what're you doing?!! Let me go!!"
Pronto had tied Joe to a post that materialized nearby and was adjusting
the sight of his gun. Flipping off the safety, Pronto then lifted the mammoth
weapon and levelled it at ModemMan. Somewhere, seemingly from all around him,
the voice of Boolean was laughing loudly.
"C'mon, Pronto," pleaded ModemMan, "snap out of it. Don't shoot me!
Please! I'll give you my system password, I'll make you a 255 SL co-sysop,
anything! Just don't shoot me and let the Penultimate get into the hands of
Boolean!"
MM's pleas were futile. Pronto was just about to pull the trigger when,
suddenly, Joe came out of the VR trance. He sat up and looked around,
wondering just what had happened. Boolean and Blue Ray were standing around a
monitor, also wondering why the machine had stopped working. Ray flipped the
switch up and down a few times but to no avail. The machine had stopped dead
just in the nick of time. Joe looked at Pronto. He seemed to be smiling. How
could anyone smile at a time like this, though Joe. They're probably gonna put
us into something worse now, he thought. That, or just kill us.
Suddenly, the door burst open and federal agents from the Modem
Operations Directorate armed with machine guns rumbled into the room. They
were saved! Two of them quickly cuffed Boolean and Ray and took them outside
to the squad car. A quick search also turned up V.T Killer and Egg's Head
hiding together in the bathroom, trying to escape out of the window that was
in there.
Pronto came over to Joe, wiping the sweat from his face. "Wow! I can't
believe what just happened. I mean, I was right about to shoot you! Good thing
the M.O.D. Squad came in when they did. Otherwise, we might've had some real
big problems."
Joe thought for a second. "Just _how_ did the feds know where to find us,
anyway, Pronto?"
"Easy," replied Pronto. "V.T and his goon squad were so obsessed with
making sure they searched you, they never bothered searching me. I had an
emergency homing beacon in my belt buckle." Pronto smiled. "I activated it
when they brought us here and untied us and I recognized Boolean."
One of the agents came over to Pronto and whispered something in his ear.
"Oh yeah," said Pronto, "I almost forgot to ask you... how would you like to
become a member of the Directorate? We've been looking for a good agent, and
with your Penultimate powers there could be endless possibilities. So, how
about it?"
"Pronto," said Joe, smiling, "I'd be glad to join you the other members
in the struggle to bring truth, justice, and a higher transfer rate for all!"
Joe put his arm around Pronto's shoulder as they walked out into the night.
"Let's go over to Quakey's Bar and celebrate!"
"Sounds good to me, MM," said Pronto. "One question, though."
"Shoot," said Joe before he realized the irony of the expression.
"How do we get there from here? We don't even know just where the hell we
are!"
The two looked at each other and had a good laugh.
* * * *
modem.man EOF received... Transfer complete.
Terminating connection...
?Э Е ЇE>*ќ H" й ЙЊё ВпЏЅ+ 0'•©—wѓ 3¶Ў`џ† ЙwҐ©Хжg # N Wуc &ч ЌЦl¶± ѕ К l5 k
NO CARRIER
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ЪДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДї
і Word Search Puzzle і Louhal (1@10)
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДБДДДДДДДДДДДДДД
THE WORDS HIDDEN IN THIS GRID MAY RUN:
HORIZONTALLY FROM LEFT TO RIGHT AND VERTICALLY FROM TOP TO BOTTOM
HORIZONTALLY FROM RIGHT TO LEFT AND VERTICALLY FROM BOTTOM TO TOP
DIAGONALLY IN ALL DIRECTIONS.
J F P T N O F W M Y K T W U I X B O I I V K S
COMPUTER D C T U P T U O Z Z T X H E B Q N J B I T F T
H L R V W T T U P N I A U D V M K L P I A S I
B N E O E S E V Z O M R O T C E S T V N O B B
ANALOG JOY STICK X V G I G G O C A N A L O G I P S W O Q P Q H
ARRAY KEYBOARD Y Q T L F K A N I I P P L U W G O P E R M P M
BASIC LANGUAGE U U E R G B C U Q S D E S U O M K Y I G P F D
BITS MEMORY Z S B E O N N I G U A X P U S F W N Q I C Y B
BYTES MODEM Z V E J H P N P T N B B U A O D T L R O B F W
COMPUTER MONITOR W R V H N H Q D W S A V T R A E P N M X V T V
DATA MOUSE S O A E C D O V R T W L P R R K Q P A T D E T
DISKETTE OUTPUT P T R O W E D O N J L Y N A M G U N A Z R B N
DRIVE PORT R I I Z H T A C N S L H O Y U T L U V N A P R
FIELD PRINTER E N A H X G K C W M M Z M J E E F Y H B O O D
FILES PROGRAM A O B D I S K E T T E A D R X M O F K G B U Y
FONT SECTOR D M L R O Q M E B P R G O H X K R I C C Y T R
FORMATE SPREADSHEET S R E I S E T Y B G N O Y N Y Q M L J N E E G
HACKER STRING H A S M U Y N H O I L V Q B E W A E E U K D O
INPUT VARIABLES E J J E P E O R R C N M O D E M T S Q C R J Y
E V D C T T P T M Z V R D R I V E M A V U O U
T E B Y L F S M E M O R Y F V X V H Q A G C D
S R W I B A P R K B A T A D S G K H R M O S Y
PUZZLE ANSWER TO BE PUBLISHED IN THE JUNE 1994 ISSUE OF IceNEWS
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і IceNEWS is an independent newsletter published monthly as a service to і
і IceNET, its Sysops and users. The opinions & reviews expressed herein і
і are the expressed views of the respective writers. All Rights Reserved.і
АДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДДЩ