F I D O N E W S Volume 17, Number 11 13 Mar 2000 +----------------------------+---------------------------------------+ | The newsletter of the | ISSN 1198-4589 Published by: | | FidoNet community | "FidoNews" | | _ | 1-717-732-6820 1:270/720 | | / \ | | | /|oo \ | | | (_| /_) | | | _`@/_ \ _ | | | | | \ \\ | Editor: Douglas Myers, 1:270/720 | | | (*) | \ )) | DougM@paonline.com | | |__U__| / \// | | | _//|| _\ / | | | (_/(_|(____/ | | | (jm) | Newspapers should have no friends. | | | -- JOSEPH PULITZER | +----------------------------+---------------------------------------+ Table of Contents 1. EDITORIAL ................................................ 1 A Horse Tale ............................................. 1 2. LETTERS TO THE EDITOR .................................... 3 More on TheLitterBox ..................................... 3 3. COLUMNS .................................................. 4 Ol'WDB: Strange Facts .................................... 4 This Weeks Web Page ...................................... 4 4. NET HUMOR ................................................ 6 Forrest Gump & St. Peter ................................. 6 The Pudding Gang ......................................... 7 5. COMIX IN ASCII ........................................... 9 COW-ngratulating a Bull .................................. 9 6. FIDONEWS INFO ............................................ 10 Masthead ................................................. 10 FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 1 13 Mar 2000 ================================================================= EDITORIAL ================================================================= A Horse Tale Doug Myers The story of the EQUUS echo unfolding in the echo MODERATOR reads like a Zane Gray novel of the Old West. It features some of Fido's most notorious cow-poke locked in a feud over the fate of this horse pasture. The Tale: it begins with Bob Kohl, the ancestral baron of this echo, slowly losing his grip on it. In the days when the Backbone split into the NAB and Z1B, Bob decreed that his echo could no longer be carried by the newly formed Z1B... possibly to rob this new organization of the horsepower EQUUS would lend it. The result of that decree, according to sources in MODERATOR, seems to be that the echo could no longer reach half it's audience, and that at least one sysop decided to leave Fidonet now that her favorite echo was no longer available to her. Earlier this year, the EQUUS echo fell into neglect with Bob Kohl failing (or choosing not) to relist the echo in the required six month intervals. According the the code of the ELIST, such echoes are dropped from the echolist and become fair game for anyone to homestead. After the EQUUS echo fell from the elisting, Lesley-Dee Dylan, the noted SuperBitch who had quarreled with Bob Kohl over water rights (or something involving the flow of netmail) in the past staked her own claim to EQUUS. She employed the infamous echo pirate, Bobby Queen, to carry out the dastardly deed, and now his actions are being branded as horse thievery by Judge Roy Witt, acting as the Law west of the Elist Robot. The Editorial: It's difficult for this editor to see the claimed wrongdoings in this saga. First, it doesn't appear that the echo EQUUS was being run for the benefit of the echo participants in the first place... the fact that it was used as a pawn to make some political statement in the NAB/Z1B squabble at the expense of cutting off half of the nodes hardly conjures a scene of benign, caring shepherding of the echo. Secondly, the fact that it fell from the elist when all that was needed was some form of echomail or email to updated it at any time in a six-month period indicates that there was little concern about the echo on Bob Kohl's part. Bobby Queen is taken to task for relisting the echo without subsequently offering it back to Bob Kohl. Roy Witt maintains that this was Bobby's announced modus operandi in the past, and so it becomes an obligation for Bobby to continue operating in the same manner. I'm not sure how Bobby incurred this obligation, though, FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 2 13 Mar 2000 and I'm not sure I can agree with this reasoning. Whether Lesley-Dee has taken over the echo in an effort to do a service to the echo participants, or whether she is simply garnering revenge for past conflicts with Bob Kohl... it's difficult to see how Fido gains a worse echo in either case. It appears that the echo was "pirated" fair and square. ----------------------------------------------------------------- FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 3 13 Mar 2000 ================================================================= LETTERS TO THE EDITOR ================================================================= More on TheLitterBox, http://www.TheLitterBox.org (1:109/263) Echomail from the FIDONEWS echo from Tony Campbell to Frank Vest Subject: Site Review in last week's Fidonews --------------- (Douglas, if you want to cut/paste for the snooze, be my guest...) Frank, Thank you for the pleasant surprise that I got at work today. Somebody handed me a hard copy of the snooze. Surprise! First, there is no need to protect the sender, as I already know who it was. One of the voices of the 'Nugget Chorus', as I call my user base, went very quiet when the others started to crescendo. MF. I will see him later this week and I will be getting some 'ragging' in. Second, thank you for kindly pulling punches on some things, like the Affiliation typo, and the html new user problem. That is much appreciated. Third, I want to acknoledge the real sources of that page. That page started as a reference to myself, but open to all to use. The credit for the large quoted what is Fidonet section goes to Andrea Santos. The credit for the FidoNews archive goes to George Peace, The credit for the nodediff/list archive goes to Ruth Argust. Other credits go to John Souvestre, Marcus Fair, Robert Stoner, and many others. Fourth, if we are missing something, I hope others will contribute. Take care, Tony ----------------------------------------------------------------- FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 4 13 Mar 2000 ================================================================= COLUMNS ================================================================= Strange Facts *Dug up by* WDBonner@pacbell.net I bet ya' didn't know: Blaise Pascal, the celebrated French mathematician, while working as a bookkeeper at the age of 19, invented a calculating machine in 1642. --------------------------- The snake house of ancient Epidaurus, Greece, was visited by mental cases whose physicians felt that the sights there could cure them by the power of shock. (Is it too late for me? :-) --------------------------- _CHURCH SIGN_ It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin. Forbidden fruit creates many jams. Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins. Have trouble sleeping? We have sermons--come hear one. Parking is for Church patrons only. Trespassers will be Violated... Violators will be baptised! --------------------------- I bet ya' didn't know: The mosque of Mohammed Ali in Cairo, Egypt, which took 28 years to complete, pleased the Pasha of Egypt so much that he granted a generous pension to the architect Yusif Bulim--then he ordered him blinded so he could never duplicate it. (1857) --------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------- This Weeks Web Page by Frank Vest 1:124/6308(.1) What: PPoint Professional Point System Where: http://www.alcuf.ca/ppoint.htm Writer's note: There are many ways to participate in Fidonet and BBSing. Many times, the only way we think of accessing messages is by being a User calling a BBS or a Sysop operating a BBS. The "middle ground", if you will, is access by becoming a "Point". Of course, becoming a Point requires a little more knowledge on the User's part and some work on the Sysop's part. It is, however, good for both. As a Point, the User's phone and the BBS line aren't tied up for long reading sessions. This writer is a Point off of his BBS... Why? Read the FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 5 13 Mar 2000 above again and you'll understand. :) Ok... Into it: This page isn't large and doesn't have "mega links" on it. It is the author of PPoint's page. The page starts out with a logo for PPoint. Under that is the copyright statement and links to other software by Harvey Parisien. His E-Mail address is there also. It's nice to see an author that puts the E-Mail at the top instead of at the bottom. Made me feel good. Next, you find a link to some screen shots of PPoint. One can get a "feel" of how the program works from this... good idea. Under this link are "links" to download the PPoint program and other files needed to go with PPoint. Yes, there is a Windows and Dos version of PPoint. This writer currently uses the Dos version under Windows. It works very well... It's a tribute to an author that can write a Dos program that runs well under Windows. :) At the bottom of the page, is an invitation to join the "Points" echo on Fidonet which Harvey Parisien moderates. I read this echo and it is a good place to get information on Point software of all types as well as ask questions on "how to" and such. If you're interested in becoming a Point, drop by this site and DL the software. Then drop into the Points echo on your favorite BBS and ask questions. If your Sysop doesn't carry the Points echo, ask him/her to do so and find out if s/he offers Point access. See ya next week. Become a Point in Fidonet. :) Frank, flv@texoma.net ----------------------------------------------------------------- FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 6 13 Mar 2000 ================================================================= NET HUMOR ================================================================= Forrest Gump & St. Peter The day finally arrives: Forrest Gump dies and goes to heaven. He is greeted at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself. The gates are closed, however, and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper. St. Peter says "Well, Forrest, it's certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must inform you that the place is filling up fast, and we've been administering an entrance examination for everyone. Tests are fairly short, but you need to pass before you can get into Heaven". Forrest responds "It shore is good to be here St. Peter. I was looking forward to this. Nobody ever told me about any entrance exam. Sure hope the test ain't too hard; life was a big enough test as it was." St. Peter goes on, "Yes, I know Forrest, but the test I have for you is only three questions: Here is the first: What days of the week begin with the letter T? Second: How many seconds are there in a year? Third: What is God's first name?" Forrest goes away to think the questions over. He returns the next day and goes up to St. Peter to try to answer the exam questions. St. Peter waves him up and says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers." Forrest says, "Well, the first one, how many days the week begin with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one's easy. That'd be Today and Tomorrow. The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest! That's not what I was thinking, but.....you do have a point though, and I guess I didn't specify, so I give you credit for that answer". How about the next one?", asks St. Peter. "How many seconds in a year?, "Now that one's harder", says Forrest, "But I thunk and thunk about that and I guess the only answer can be twelve." Astounded St. Peter says, "Twelve! Twelve! Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?" FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 7 13 Mar 2000 Forest says "Shucks, there gotta be twelve: January second, February second, March second.....". "Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you're going with this, and I guess I see your point, though that wasn't quite what I had in mind, but I'll give you credit for that one, too. Let's go on with the next and final question. Can you tell me God's first name"? Forrest replied, "Andy." "OK, OK," said a frustrated St. Peter, "I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you came up with the name, "Andy", as the first name of God?" "That was the easiest one of all," Forrest replied. "I learned it from the song.... "ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN... Found on the web and shared with you by: wdbonner@pacbell.net ----------------------------------------------------------------- The Pudding Gang Thanks to Roy Reed This is just too funny not to share. From an article which appeared in the Dublin Times about a bank robbery on March 2, 1999: Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, their efforts at disabling the internal security system got underway immediately. The robbers, who expected to find one or two large safes filled with cash and valuables, were surprised to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered throughout the bank. The robbers cracked the first safe's combination, and inside they found only a bowl of vanilla pudding. As recorded on the bank's audio tape system, one robber said, "At least we'll have a bit to eat." The robbers opened up a second safe, and it also contained nothing but vanilla pudding. The process continued until all the safes were opened. They found not one pound sterling, a diamond, or an ounce of gold. Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of pudding. Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving with nothing more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach. The newspaper headline read: FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 8 13 Mar 2000 IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING. ----------------------------------------------------------------- FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 9 13 Mar 2000 ================================================================= COMIX IN ASCII ================================================================= ______________________________ / \ ( For he's a jolly good fellow! ) \________________ ____________/ ) ) (__) // (__) (oo) / (___) /(oo)---\/ (o o) /-------\/ || \ /-------\ / | ||----|| O|| | \ * ||----|| ^^ ||---,|| * ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^ Two cows COW-ngratulating a bull ----------------------------------------------------------------- FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 10 13 Mar 2000 ================================================================= FIDONEWS INFO ================================================================= Masthead + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- FIDONEWS STAFF - -- -- -- -- -- -- -- + | | | Editor: Douglas Myers, 1:270/720, DougM@paonline.com | | Webmaster: Jim Barchuk, jb@fidonews.org | | Columnist: Joe Jared, 1:103/0, jarhead@osirusoft.com | | (Fido Via Internet Hubs column) | | Columnist: Warren D. Bonner, 1:103/401, wdbonner@pacbell.net | | (Warren uses the pen name "Ol'WDB") | | Humor: Roy Reed, rcreedv@juno.com | | Features: Frank Vest, 1:124/6308.1 | | | + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- + + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- - EDITORS EMERITI - -- -- -- -- -- -- -- + | | | Tom Jennings, Thom Henderson, Dale Lovell, Vince | | Perriello, Tim Pozar, Sylvia Maxwell, Donald Tees, | | Christopher Baker, Zorch Frezberg, Henk Wolsink | | | + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- + "Fido", "FidoNet" and the dog-with-diskette are U.S. registered trademarks of Tom Jennings, P.O. Box 410923, San Francisco, CA 94141, and are used with permission. Fidonews is published weekly by and for the members of Fidonet. Fidonews is Copyright (C) 2000 by Douglas Myers, though authors retain rights to their contributed articles. Opinion expressed by the authors is strictly their own. Noncommercial duplication and distribution within Fidonet is encouraged. Authors are encouraged to send their articles in ASCII text to Douglas Myers at one of his addresses above. The weekly edition of Fidonews is distributed through the file area FIDONEWS, and is published as echomail in the echo FIDONEWS. These sources are normally available through your Network Coordinator. The current and past issues are also available from the following sources: + -- -- -- -- -- -- - FIDONEWS AVAILABILITY - -- -- -- -- -- -- + | | | Freq FIDONEWS @ 1:270/720, 1:140/1, or 1:396/1 | | ftp://ftp.sstar.com/fidonet/fnews/ | | ftp://ftp.nwstar.com/fidonet/fidonews/ | | http://www.fidonews.org | | email subscription: majordomo@fidonews.org | | (subject: help body: list) | | ftp mail: ftpmail@fidonews.org (subject: help) | | | + -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- + FIDONEWS 17-11 Page 11 13 Mar 2000 -----------------------------------------------------------------