Computer underground Digest Sun Feb 28 1993 Volume 5 : Issue 17 ISSN 1004-042X Editors: Jim Thomas and Gordon Meyer (TK0JUT2@NIU.BITNET) Archivist: Brendan Kehoe Shadow-Archivists: Dan Carosone / Paul Southworth Ralph Sims / Jyrki Kuoppala Copy Editor: Etaion Shrdlu, Seniur CONTENTS, #5.17 (Feb 28 1993) Subject: File 1--Police motivations re. computer crime Subject: File 2--ACLU Interesting in Rusty & Edie's BBS? Subject: File 3--Re: File 4--Technology & Populist Publishing (#5.15) Subject: File 4--A Case for Electronic Publishing Subject: File 5--Obtaining Back Issues of CuD via FTP Subject: File 6--New Computer Viruses Run Amok (sort of) (Reprint) Subject: File 7--Netsys Startup Cu-Digest is a weekly electronic journal/newsletter. Subscriptions are available at no cost from tk0jut2@mvs.cso.niu.edu. The editors may be contacted by voice (815-753-6430), fax (815-753-6302) or U.S. mail at: Jim Thomas, Department of Sociology, NIU, DeKalb, IL 60115. Issues of CuD can also be found in the Usenet comp.society.cu-digest news group; on CompuServe in DL0 and DL4 of the IBMBBS SIG, DL1 of LAWSIG, and DL0 and DL12 of TELECOM; on GEnie in the PF*NPC RT libraries and in the VIRUS/SECURITY library; from America Online in the PC Telecom forum under "computing newsletters;" on the PC-EXEC BBS at (414) 789-4210; in Europe from the ComNet in Luxembourg BBS (++352) 466893; and using anonymous FTP on the Internet from ftp.eff.org (192.88.144.4) in /pub/cud, red.css.itd.umich.edu (141.211.182.91) in /cud, halcyon.com (192.135.191.2) in /pub/mirror/cud, and ftp.ee.mu.oz.au (128.250.77.2) in /pub/text/CuD. European readers can access the ftp site at: nic.funet.fi pub/doc/cud. Back issues also may be obtained from the mail server at mailserv@batpad.lgb.ca.us. COMPUTER UNDERGROUND DIGEST is an open forum dedicated to sharing information among computerists and to the presentation and debate of diverse views. CuD material may be reprinted for non-profit as long as the source is cited. Some authors do copyright their material, and they should be contacted for reprint permission. It is assumed that non-personal mail to the moderators may be reprinted unless otherwise specified. Readers are encouraged to submit reasoned articles relating to computer culture and communication. Articles are preferred to short responses. Please avoid quoting previous posts unless absolutely necessary. DISCLAIMER: The views represented herein do not necessarily represent the views of the moderators. Digest contributors assume all responsibility for ensuring that articles submitted do not violate copyright protections. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: 26 Feb 1993 00:22:00 -0500 (EST) From: MFPORTER@DELPHI.COM Subject: File 1--Police motivations re. computer crime In the wake of every law enforcement action involving hackers, there is speculation about the motives of the police and the government in targeting computer-related crime. As readers of CuD well know, this topic can lead to some very wild conclusions -- The Government must be afraid of something! They see "hackers" as a threat to national security! The police are pawns of multi-national corporations! Conclusions such as these make for exciting commentary, but in the end they are not productive. They play sharply upon people's fears, but they sidestep the real challenges which face the community of computer users. The vast majority of the "hacker crackdown" actions and the ongoing harassment of hackers have nothing to do with perceived threats to national security. Most of the law enforcement actions against hackers have consisted of cops simply trying to do their job: protecting people from crime. This job includes protecting corporate persons such as AT&T and the RBOCs, as well as their customers. (This may not be the best use of our society's limited police resources, but that's a different issue, as is the question of what should be defined as a "crime.") To the police and prosecutors, the computer criminal is just another criminal. In this sense, at least, in most computer-crime cases -- as in most cases in general -- law enforcement agencies have good intentions. Good intentions, however, do not mean that there is not a real threat to the civil liberties of those who use computers and telephone networks. From Operation Sun Devil to the still-murky incident at the Pentagon City Mall, we all have cause for concern about the choices of both targets and methods by those who seek to fight computer-related crime, whatever their intentions. Actions which are designed to deter crime may all too easily deter honest citizens from exercising their constitutionally protected freedoms. As Justice Louis D. Brandeis wrote in 1928: Experience should teach us to be most on our guard to protect liberty when the Government's purposes are beneficent. Men born to freedom are naturally alert to repel invasion of their liberty by evil-minded rulers. The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well-meaning but without understanding. (_Olmstead v. United States_) It's that lack of understanding which results in most of the problems before us. We've all heard plenty of examples of some law enforcement agents' lack of understanding of the computer world, be it "underground" or otherwise. Extreme conclusions about the government's motives, jumped to by some members of the computer underground, show the lack of understanding on the other side. Those who rely upon computers -- that is, everyone in the developed world -- and everyone who is interested in preserving civil liberties must work to bridge this gap in understanding. Books such as _The Hacker Crackdown_, with its candid and fair assessment of the events of 1990, from both sides of the fence, are an important step in the right direction. So is the work of the Electronic Frontier Foundation, which uses the tools of law and government to educate those in power and to challenge those who would threaten our freedom. Paranoia and extremism, on either side, does little to help. ((The author is an attorney in Maryland and a former systems analyst.)) ------------------------------ Date: 26 Feb 1993 05:31:19 (EST) From: anonymous@anony.mous.edu Subject: File 2--ACLU Interesting in Rusty & Edie's BBS? ((MODERATORS' NOTE: The following summary was sent to us from a Clarinet reader. One source cautions that the press may have over-stated the involvement of the ACLU at this point. Also, the rumor that the FBI seized the house in which the R&E computers were stored is apparently not true. Reportedly, the FBI is returning the file cabinet in which tax documents, house title, and other records were kept.)) BOARDMAN, Ohio (UPI) -- The American Civil Liberties Union of Ohio says it may challenge the constitutionality of an FBI raid that shut down a Boardman computer bulletin board service. The Jan. 30 raid at the home of Russell and Edwinia Hardenburgh was conducted with a search warrant that alleged the couple illegally distributed copyrighted software programs without permission. The story reports that the board was one of the largest in the country, with 124 phone lines. According to the story, R&E's logged 3.4 million calls since 1984 and more than 4,000 new calls daily. R&E's had over 14,000 subscribers. The story summarizes the equipment seized, including business records and hardware. The ACLU's Ohio legal director, Kevin O'Neill, said Thursday the FBI copyright infringement allegations might have merit, but such allegations are normally resolved in civil lawsuits. He noted that Rusty & Edie's 14,000 subscribers are more subscribers than many small circulation newspapers enjoy. "Shutting down a computer bulletin board is analogous to shutting down a newspaper printing press," O'Neill said. "Our conception of constitutionally protected public forums must be broadened to include new communication networks like computer bulletin boards." The story reports that no charges have been filed against the Hardenburgs and quotes Mark Kindt, a Cleveland businessman and former regional director for the Federal Trade Commission, as comparing the FBI raid to "hunting gnats with an elephant gun," and he suggests that the FBI should have been more careful in its procedures. %%Computer bulletin boards are electronic town halls. Even if (Rusty & Edie's) pirated the moon, the government should have proceeded in a more careful, deliberative manner." ------------------------------ Date: Thu, 25 Feb 93 10:43:38 PST From: kurt@tc.fluke.COM (Kurt Guntheroth) Subject: File 3--Re: File 4--Technology & Populist Publishing (#5.15) Sheesh. Of course book publishing is business. Why should people bear the great expense of typesetting, printing, and distributing a book if they don't expect to make any money out of it. Sure, you'll say it's for the love of books or the pursuit of knowledge, but that's bullshit. Remember, if the publisher can't sell the book, that means NOBODY WANTS TO READ IT. Now maybe you know of a bunch of books that nobody wants to read but are so critical to our intellectual growth that they must be published anyway. I don't. I see a bunch of hack authors who THINK they have something important to say, and a bunch of cultists, and a bunch of paranoid conspiracy theorists, who can't get their garbage published and want to take it out on anybody but themselves. Sure an occasional gem may get missed by an editor pressed for time and buried under mounds of material. But remember, those guys are paid to find all the good stuff. They're quite motivated. I don't think they miss very often. Does a bunch of dreck get published? Sure. Is it worse than your dreck? Maybe but maybe not. My father has written a book about his dog for cirssakes. He can't get it published even though he's convinced everyone wants to learn of his dog's great spirit and almost telepathic link to her master. What's wrong with this picture? Is it the cruel money hungry publishing industry, or perhaps has the author misjudged the world's need to learn about his hound? In short, I don't blame the publishing industry. Everyone in the universe thinks they can write the great american novel. 99% of them are dead wrong. ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 27 Feb 1993 23:18:54 (CST) From: CuD Moderators <tk0jut2@mvs.cso.niu.edu) Subject: File 4--A Case for Electronic Publishing Kurt Guntheroth makes several legitimate points in criticizing the problems of electronic publishing. Yes, there is much chaff amidst the wheat. Yes, everybody who writes (obviously) thinks that they have something worth reading. Yes, there is much value in the gate-keeping processes of the publishing business. Yes, the advent of electronic publishing could flood cyberspace with near-infinite bytes of nonsense. But, while agreeing on those points, let's take a second look at the implications of Phil Shapiro's post in CuD 5.15 to which Kurt responds ("Something's not quite right," File 4). The original poster made two main points: Conventional publishing, whether books or peer-reviewed journal articles, is an arduous task, far more difficult than non-writers recognize. Publishers may reject books because of quality or because the manuscript, while worthy, does not fall within a topical theme that many publishers, especially academic ones, put together as a specialty for marketing purposes. Although writers with a demonstrable track record of successful publishing often need only provide a short prospectus and perhaps a first chapter to entice a publisher to offer a contract, most writers must provide more. It is expensive and time consuming to identify and contact appropriate publishers, which dissuades many from publishing. Rejections are generally discouraging, and only with experience (and some previous publishing success) does an author realize that rejection is built into the publishing game. Writing and publishing are both psychologically and physically hard work. Second, the original poster correctly identified the potential of electronic media as a possible alternative that would supplement, *not* replace, conventional publishing. I agree with the spirit of Kurt's criticisms--the potential for expanded access to ideas and information carries with it the risk of inundation with banal self-indulgence. However, the value of the former considerably outweighs the risks of the latter. Let's compare a few features of print with electronic media. 1. Book publishing is market driven. This is not necessarily bad, but it does mean that if an insufficient audience exists to purchase the book, it will likely not be published. 2. Book publication is slow. The core ideas of most scholarly works are at least two years old when a book hits the streets. For example, a book written in 1986-87 that is submitted to the publisher in 1988 would undergo editing, minor revisions, and galley proofing, and hit the streets in 1989. 3. Books are generally limited by a production format that conforms to preferred length and style. This can impose arbitrary restrictions of ideas presented in chapters, shape the organization of the ideas and discourse, and artificially truncate the development of crucial ideas. None of these disadvantages are prohibitive. Authors and publishers have worked around them for centuries. But, electronic publishing offers something more. What does it offer? 1. Electronic publishing is fairly immediate. One can "publish" as soon as the text has been typed in (and hopefully edited and spell-checked). For scholarly works, this dramatically updates data, disseminates ideas and scholarship, and keeps others abreast of research and bibliographies in a timely fashion. 2. Electronic publishing is, for the end user, nearly free. Newsletters such as Telecom Digest, EFFector, People's Tribune, Cu-Digest, or the E-Journal need not recoup postage, publication costs, or salaries for the masochistic folk who put them out. 3. Electronic publishing is able to effectively and economically target and reach a fairly specialized audience and fill a vacuum untouched by print media. There is no hard-copy counterpart to CuD, PHRACK, the cDc publications, Activist Times Inc., and some of the other successful journal/newsletters. 4. Electronic publishing is effective. Readers can judge for themselves the value of CuD, but it's undeniable that the pioneering efforts of PHRACK, LOD/TJ, P/hun, PIRATE, and similar publications were critical to shaping one slice of the computer culture of the 1980s. Comparable hardcopy publications would unlikely have been as effective or as widely distributed. That said, some critics identify potential problems. The drawbacks of electronic publishing derive in part from its strengths. The ease of publication reduces quality control; Some doubt that the review process for scholarly journals would be as rigorous (although there is certainly no reason inherent in the medium for this to be so); Gresham's law might apply--schlock will drive out the quality works; nobody will read it. I have more faith in cybernauts than the critics. A few examples might illustrate my point. 1. Most end-users possess a delete function (or, at worst, ctl/alt/del). One isn't forced to read a 500K tome if it is dull, and poor works will remain confined to a space in a directory corner and eventually be copied over with something more pleasing. 2. Current forms of electronic communication provide hints for the fate of works in which there is no interest. Electronic newsletters come and go, Usenet and other discussion groups emerge and if they are popular, they thrive. If they are unpopular, they languish and stay dormant. Telecom Digest has been in existance for over a decade, and PHRACK for almost as long. Even CuD is entering its fourth year. They have not been driven out by the explosion of other publications, and their readership steadily increases. If electronic publications attempt to remain sensitive to the audience and attempt--as Pat Townson has done with Telecom Digest--to keep on the cutting edge of timely issues, they will continue to provide a valuable supplement to print media. 3. Electronic publications are often ad hoc and unsupervised. For media intending to establish credibility as scholarly outlets, this can be a problem. Electronic publications are rarely peer reviewed, publications generally do not count toward the tenure sheet, and without some quality control, the "findings" of studies may lack legitimacy. The way around this simple: Professional associations can more aggressively sponsor electronic media in the same way that many sponsor their journals. If, for example, the Midwest Sociology Society began an electronic journal, it could have the same quality controls, the same editorial guidance, and the same procedure it uses for its hardcopy quartly (The Sociological Quarterly). The same could apply to monographs, whether fiction or non-fiction. 4.1 If everybody who thought they could write a book actually wrote one, the nets would be inundated. This possibility, though, is unlikely. Not everybody who thinks they can write a book is actually capable of doing so, and many a work lies uncompleted because the author lost steam, ideas, or motivation to continue. Books are also difficult to read on-line, and printing them off can be more of a bother than it's worth. Even hypertext (or the equivalents) requires considerable perseverance by the reader to wade through a long tome. It is unlikely that books will flood the nets. 5) How do we respond to "trash?" Even recent partjSRAants in Usenet newsgroups are aware of the high signal-to-noise ratio in most groups. Delete keys and kill files work quite well. Or, in the worst cases, one simply unsubscribes, and Voila! No more trash. A few examples from my own experience illustrate some of the potential of electronic publishing. In teaching criminal justice courses, I'm often unable to find appropriate texts. It's possible to pull together papers from journals and use Kinko's to reproduce them. This, however, can be expensive and the problems of copyright must be overcome. Colleagues with works-in-progress, unpublished papers, or book chapters in draft form share the electronic versions which I print out for a fraction of conventional publishing (or even Kinko) costs, and they become the classroom resource. Texts are thereby tailored to a specific course with a specific instructor's style, students save money, and life is good. In a second example, I finished a draft chapter for a book. The draft was several hundred pages long, and it had to be reduced to about 35 pages. The full text, although book-length, was a bit too narrow for a conventional book market. Through the marvels of electronic publishing, I was able to tailor it to a course I periodically teach, revise it each time the course is taught, and use it in place of a text. It's quick, cheap, makes lecturing much easier, the students are happy, the instructor is happy, and life is good. Could this manuscript be revised into a conventional book? Sure. But time constraints and changing interests make it unlikely that I ever will. I'm quite content to limit it to friends' and classroom use. Here, Kurt is again correct--this is a work that isn't appropriate in its present form for a book. But, Phil, too, is correct--conventional publishers have left a gap, and the value of electronic publishing is the ability to fill it. The publishing industry is lagging behind to the extent that it is not developing innovative ways of plugging into the electronic age to take advantage of the accessibility and economy of a potential market. Especially in times of economic crunch, many of us are cutting back on books and journals and relying more on less conventional media for professional development. As the price of books increases, many of us are simply priced out of the market. We are not priced out of the net. It bears repeating that I am not arguing for a replacement for conventional publications, but for a supplement to them. As one who publishes extensively in conventional outlets, I fully recognize their value. The way to publish electronically is to...is to..well, is to publish electronically. The outlets are growing, as illustrated by those on Arachnet, a Bitnet discussion group devoted to addressing these issues. The E-Journal provides a model for how an electronic medium can establish an editorial board and a peer review process. Telecom Digest and Risks Digest are nifty examples of accurate and up-to-date information being spread, debated, and refined. Cu-Digest is an example of how USA Today might look if it went electronic with an open forum (according to one observer, although I'm not sure if that's an insult or a compliment). In short, I agree with Kurt, but I also agree with Phil Shapiro. Electronic publishing possesses risks, but it also possesses a potential whose value has barely been recognized. Those who have read to this line are on the cutting edge of it all, and the way to develop it is to submit articles, subscribe to newsgroups, and continue to participate in carving out a niche on the frontier. ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 27 Feb 1993 11:41:21 (CST) From: CuD Moderators <tk0jut2@mvs.cso.niu.edu) Subject: File 5--Obtaining Back Issues of CuD via FTP CuD Moderators are continually asked: "What's ftp and how to I use it?" "FTP" stands for File Transfer Protocol and is a way of obtaining files from a remote site. You must have a computer account with ftp capability. Universities and some public access systems are common locations for such accounts. The system you are on must also support ftp. If you aren't sure what this means, contact your local sysguru. If you have access only to your favorite local BBS, you're out of luck. You should invest a few dollars for an account on The Well, Mindvox, Netsys, Netcom, or some of the other systems providing ftp/telnet/IRC and other services. Addresses for the ftp sites are listed in the header at the top of each issue of CuD. The CuD archives and mailserver are maintained by a bunch of hardworking guys (listed in the header, above) and through the generosity of the systems that provide the space. If you browse the archives, keep these points in mind as a matter of courtesy to those providing the space: 1. USE THE FACILITIES DURING OFF-HOURS (the more off the better) TO LIMIT CONGESTION 2. DO NOT STAY ON LONGER THAN NECESSARY 3. USE THE SITE CLOSEST TO YOU The CuD Archmeisters have set up the sites identically. If your system allows ftping, you can try typing this command: ftp some.address.you.choose.edu Then, assuming all works as it should, you will be connected and asked for your login. At the prompt, type: anonymous You will then be asked for your password. Type your logon id. If I were to log into Dan Carasone's site in Australia, I would simply type: login? anonymous pw? tk0jut2@mp.cs.niu.edu You move about in these systems as you would in most other Unix systems. Use "cd" to change directories, "ls" to see what's in a directory, and other standard stuff. Remember, commands, directory names, and files are case-sensitive, so be sure to keep upper and lower case letters straight. After you've logged in, change to the cud directory by typing: cd pub/cud Then type ls and you should see the following: 150 Opening ASCII mode data connection for /bin/ls. total 120 -rw-r--r-- 1 brendan 12 0 Apr 25 1992 .notar -rw-r--r-- 1 brendan 149 5291 Feb 24 08:11 Added -rw-r--r-- 1 brendan 149 11776 Feb 24 08:11 Index drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:08 alcor drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:08 ane drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Jan 3 22:12 aotd drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 1024 Nov 12 22:41 ati drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:08 bootlegger drwxr-xr-x 3 brendan 149 512 Apr 25 1992 ccc drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 3584 Jan 7 04:04 cdc drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Apr 25 1992 cdugd drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 chalisti drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Feb 24 08:10 chaos drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 cpi drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 3584 Feb 22 22:45 cud drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Oct 17 05:28 dfp drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Apr 25 1992 fbi drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Nov 2 19:24 inform drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 1024 Apr 25 1992 law drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 lod drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Feb 10 01:54 misc drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 narc drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Apr 25 1992 networks drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Apr 25 1992 nfx drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 1536 Oct 6 17:38 nia drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 nsa drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 1536 Dec 11 07:53 papers drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Feb 10 01:54 phantasy drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 1024 Jan 7 04:08 phrack drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 phun drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 pirate drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 ppp drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 1024 Apr 25 1992 schools drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 synd drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 May 18 14:09 tap drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Sep 18 17:58 upi drwxr-xr-x 2 brendan 149 512 Nov 29 21:22 wview Each of the above are subdirectories that contain papers, journals, and other documents. "phantasy" contains back issues of Phantasy. "lod" contains the "Legion of Doom/Technical Journals." "cud" contains all the back issues of CuD, including indexes. To get to these subdirectories, simply type cd cud (or: cd tap or whatever). To download a file, the command is get file.name (or, for multiple files, mget file.name1 file.name2) A file that ends in .Z is a compressed file, which means, after downloading to your own system, you must uncompress. If you get a file called file.Z, to uncompress the command uncompress file.Z should work. If this sounds confusing, we strongly recommend purchasing Brendan Kehoe's ZEN AND THE ART OF THE INTERNET or Ed Krol's THE WHOLE INTERNET. Both are worth having, and both provide easy-to-follow instructions. PLEASE REMEMBER: AS A COURTESY TO THOSE WHO MAINTAIN THE ARCHIVES AND ESPECIALL TO THOSE KIND ENOUGH TO PROVIDE SPACE, BE GOOD NET CITIZEN: 1) LOG IN AT OFF-HOURS (after midnight on the site's time), 2) DO NOT BE A HOG, and 3) USE THE SITE NEAREST YOU. If you have problems with ftp, it is best to first ask your local gurus for advice rather than the ftp site crowd or the CuD moderators. We don't know your system, so we're not the ones to ask. ------------------------------ Date: Sat, 27 Feb 93 11:27 CST From: tk0kbf1@mvs.cso.niu.edu Subject: File 6--New Computer Viruses Run Amok (sort of) (Reprint) This came to me in e-mail today, having travelled around half the country first. I don't know who Maggie Zarnosky is, but she deserves a big thank you. Spread it around with pleasure! ================================================================ MAGGIE ZARNOSKY, LIBRARY, VA. POLYTECHNIC UNIV.,SENT ME THIS. ENJOY!!: VIRUSES: PAUL REVERE VIRUS: This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack---once if by LAN, twice if by C:. POLITICALLY CORRECT VIRUS: Never calls itself a "virus," but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism." RIGHT TO LIFE VIRUS: Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to first see a counselor about possible alternatives. ROSS PEROT VIRUS: Activates every component in your system, just before the whole thing quits. MARIO CUOMO VIRUS: It would be a great virus, but it refuses to run. OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS: Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands back to 200MB. AT&T VIRUS: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting. THE MCI VIRUS: Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus. TED TURNER VIRUS: Colorizes your monochrome monitor. ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS: Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back. DAN QUAYLE VIRUS: Prevents your system from spawning any child processes without joining into a binary network. DAN QUAYLE VIRUS 2: Their is sumthing rong with your computer, ewe just can't figyour out watt. GOVERNMENT ECONOMIST VIRUS: Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine. NEW WORLD ORDER VIRUS: Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it. FEDERAL BUREAUCRAT VIRUS: Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of the computer. GALLUP VIRUS: Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin of error). TERRY RANDLE VIRUS: Prints "Oh no you don't" whenever you choose "Abort" from the "Abort, Retry, Fail" message. TEXAS VIRUS: Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file. ADAM AND EVE VIRUS: Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple. MICHAEL JACKSON VIRUS: Hard to identify because it is constantly altering its appearance. This virus won't harm your PC, but it will trash your car. CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS: The computer locks up, screen splits eratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem. AIRLINE VIRUS: You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore. FREUDIAN VIRUS: Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard. PBS VIRUS: Your PC stops every few minutes to ask for money. ELVIS VIRUS: Your computer gets fat, slow, and lazy and then self destructs, only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America. OLLIE NORTH VIRUS: Turns your printer into a document shredder. NIKE VIRUS: Just Does It! SEARS VIRUS: Your data won't appear unless you buy new cables, power supply, and a set of shocks. JIMMY HOFFA VIRUS: Nobody can find it. CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS: Runs every program on the hard drive simultaneously, but doesn't allow the user to accomplish anything. KEVORKIAN VIRUS: Helps your computer shut down whenever it wants to. IMELDA MARCOS VIRUS: Sings you a song (slightly off key) on boot up then subtracts money from your Quicken account and spends it all on expensive shoes it purchases through Prodigy. STAR TREK VIRUS: Invades your system in places where no virus has gone before. HEALTH CARE VIRUS: Test your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends you a bill for $4,500. GEORGE BUSH VIRUS: It starts by boldly stating, "Read my test.... no new files!" on the screen, proceeds to fill up all the free space on your hard drive with new files, then blames it on the Congress Virus. CLEVELAND INDIANS VIRUS: Makes your 486/50 machine perform like a 286/AT. LAPD VIRUS: It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in "self-defense." CHICAGO CUBS VIRUS: Your PC makes frequent mistakes and comes in last in the reviews, but you still love it. ------------------------------ Date: Sun, 21 Feb 93 20:33:40 PST From: Len Rose <len@NETSYS.COM> Subject: File 7--Netsys Startup NETSYS COMMUNICATION SERVICES Palo Alto, California Netsys is a network of large Sun servers dedicated to providing Internet access to individuals and corporations that need solid, reliable Internet connectivity. An account on Netsys will provide members with : Electronic Mail: to/from the Internet and gatewayed networks. (including BITNET, MILNET, and even Compuserve). Usenet: The worldwide networked message system that generates roughly 40-50 megabytes of information daily. Telnet: The capability to login to any remote host in any part of the world. Ftp: The ability to send and receive documents/programs/data to/from any site in the world. Misc: Archie,Gopher, Internet Relay Chat, and WAIS search tools. Support: 24 hour emergency response service. Dialups: Palo Alto area, High Speed (V.32 and PEP) Private Accounts: $20 monthly ( with file storage capacity of 5 megabytes) $1 per megabyte per month over 5 megabytes. Commercial Accounts: $40 monthly (file storage capacity of 10 megabytes) $1 per megabyte per month over 10 megabytes. Newsfeeds: We offer both nntp and uucp based newsfeeds , with all domestic newsgroups,and including all foreign newsgroups. SPECIAL FEATURES THAT NO ONE ELSE CAN PROVIDE Satellite Weather: Netsys has available real time satellite weather imagery. Images are available in gif, or Sun raster format. Contact us for NFS mirroring, and other special arrangement. These images are directly downlinked from the GOES bird. Contact Steve Eigsti (steve@netsys.com) Satellite Usenet: Netsys is offering Pagesat's satellite newsfeed service for large volume news distribution. Members of Netsys can obtain substantial discounts for the purchase and service costs of this revolutionary method of Usenet news distribution.Both Unix and MS Windows software available. Contact Kate Alexander (kate@pagesat.com) for product information. Paging Services: Netsys is offering Pagesat's Internet to Pager mail service. Members of Netsys can obtain critical email to pager services. Pagesat has the ability to gateway any critical electronic mail to your display pager. Leased Line Internet Connections Pagesat Inc. offers low cost 56k and T1 Internet connections all over the United States. Since Pagesat is an FCC common carrier, our savings on leased lines can be passed on to you. For further information, contact Duane Dubay (djd@pagesat.com). We offer other services such as creating domains, acting as MX forwarders, and of course uucp based newsfeeds. Netsys is now offering completely open shell access to internet users. For accounts, or more information , send mail to netsys@netsys.com Netsys will NEVER accept more members than our capacity to serve. Netsys prides itself on it's excellent connectivity (including multiple T1's, and SMDS) ,lightly loaded systems, and it's clientele. We're not your average Internet Service Provider. And it shows. ------------------------------ End of Computer Underground Digest #5.17 ************************************