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ARRoGANT CoURiERS WiTH ESSaYS
Grade Level: Type of Work Subject/Topic is on:
[ ]6-8 [ ]Class Notes [Advantages of Stupidity ]
[x]9-10 [ ]Cliff Notes [ ]
[ ]11-12 [x]Essay/Report [ ]
[ ]College [ ]Misc [ ]
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THE ADVANTAGES OF STUPIDITY
Most people say being stupid will lead no where. They claim that it
is the worst possible condition in which to spend one's life, and if
possible, it should be completely avoided. They would even suggest if the
symptoms of stupidity are caught in the early stages, it could easily be
treated by a surgeon. The most effective method used to do this is the
chainsaw technique, later described in volume two. Yet, perhaps if people
took a closer look at some of the advantages stupidity had to offer, they
wouldn't have such a negative attitude toward it. After reading this
paper, one will understand the advantages of stupidity.
Admittedly, stupidity has certain disadvantages. Life isn't a bowl of
cherries. And being stupid doesn't make it any fruitier. Being stupid can
annoy even the most sensitive people. If one acts stupid, and does it in
the wrong crowd, like a group of adults, it will seem more immature than
funny. If one is forced to act stupid while dealing with lower life forms,
for example, high school teachers, one may encounter barriers such as
cruelty and insensitivity, with the utterance of statements like, "Think
with your head straight!" or, "You have a brain, use it." Yet these are
all true, there are still many advantages to stupidity.
The first advantage is very easy to understand. Stupid people are
never asked to do a lot. Many have noticed that people tend to steer away
from someone they feel may be stupid. This is for a very good reason. The
stupidity which they posses makes a name for themselves, a name which can
be very difficult to shake. Possibly, it is a word which describes the
working habits of the person, such as "crappy". Yet, this creates a
positive situation for the stupid person. They will have a lot of free
time on their hands for more of lifes truly meaningful pleasures. Some of
these activities are combing facial hair, and counting the pixels on a Sony
TV.
Now, there has been a rumour going around that suggests that stupid
people have low expectations. This is true. They are so stupid that they
don't realize great from O.K. They could have a Sanyo cordless phone, but
would probably choose instead a Pierre Cardin alarm clock telephone,
because it comes free with their sensamatic folding bed.
And someone with the "advantage" of stupidity might have a hard time
doing certain tasks, or setting things up. Yet this isn't all bad. For
example, if a stupid person leaves the chore, and comes back to it later,
no one will be able to understand it. Would they get fired from their job?
No. For the very simple reason that no one would understand their work
except for them. The job would have to be given back to the stupid person,
perhaps with a higher salary, or someone would do it for them, leaving them
with even more free time!
Free time is great for brainstorming (Admittedly this seems to be a bad
choice of words!). Yet the ideas stupid people create tend to be original.
For example, when was the last time someone stupid said something, and made
one think about it? It seems that people are always talking about someone
elses dumb idea. An example of such an idea would be, "How many stories
will that english teacher drop before having a stroke?" This would suggest
that stupid people may have the upper hand when it comes to thinking up
original ideas. In fact, the next time someone wants an original idea for
something, they should try talking to their local, community stupid person.
The reason for this is that while a stupid person thinks with his head, he
does not do so an organized manner. This is why they have so much
creativity. By thinking in this fashion, their ideas have a natural
tendency to flow more easily, without the interruptions which occur from
the editing of thoughts that logical people would have normally. Thus if
someone else should say to one, "That was a stupid idea!" one should merely
look that person straight in the eye, and say, "Thank-you!" This also
means that the claim, "Stupid minds think alike." is not true. All stupid
minds have different ideas, each idea being original.
One of the final advantages of stupidity is that stupid people are
always remembered, even after graduation day. It has been noticed how a
quiet person is always hard to detect, and often remains anonymous. There
is a very good reason for this. The mind has a hard time keeping quiet
people in its memory track. But it is much easier and pleasing for the
mind to remember someone really stupid. Anyways, when was the last time one
laughed at an idiot in ones grade 12 class? When was the last time one
laughed at the little kid at the back of the room? The evidence here
proves how stupid people last longer in someones thoughts. The largest
advantage which arises from stupidity is that it takes up 2/3 of DNA
storage space, which is excellent for keeping stupidity in the family.
Thus, stupidity clearly has many advantages, as long as someone is
smart enough to use them! It is important to understand that stupid people
are like all other humans physically. Yet, because of the difference
between smart and stupid people, smart human beings should give them some
breathing space. Teachers can learn that someone graced with stupidity,
deserves more respect. After all, they are special. Andrew Likakis Mr.
Hussey Dec. 16, 1991