Episodes That Won't Be Filmed Anytime Soon!

The following is a bit of X humor.
I picked this up off kris@wam.umd.edu 's webpage. I've edited it a bit and
added a few more.  Please tell me what you think of these, and if you have
any submissions, please email at simc@mundil.cs.mu.oz.au

                The X-files/Baywatch Summer Special
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Aliens abduct David Hasselhoff's personality and acting ability.


                          Seaquest XF
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Renowned FBI agents Mulder and Scully are pulled out of deep freeze sleep
to investigate the overabundance of monsters and lack of plot in
Seaquest DSV. 
Mulder and Scully discover that the crew are worm infested, germ carrying, and 
possessed by ghosts of Atlantis. Worst of all, Boy Wonder develops 
a crush on Scully.


                            Cutbacks
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Mulder and Scully reassigned to meter maids due to government
cutbacks. Plot dull until alien clone assassins double park while Mulder
and Scully are on duty.


                       Married with X-files
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Fox network is forced to combine shows in order to cut costs. Al
is abducted by the sock Aliens and Mulder is abducted by Peg. Kelly and Bud
write "She is one" on Scully while she's asleep and leave her in a forest.


                        Mulder and Butthead
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Even the thought sickens me.


                             XXX files
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Mulder the porn king finally acts out his fantasies with Scully.
Shown as a Triple feature with "The loin King" and "Clear and
present Banger".


                    The Ricki Lake X-Files Special
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Cancelled due to DD's near fatal heart attack after hearing about the
special.


                           X-Files No More
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The X-Files division has long been shut down.  Scully has returned
to Quantico, while Mulder has gone into the field of ghostbusting.
When Scully discovers mutant cheesecake in her fridge, she calls in
her former partner to help her dispose of it down the garbage disposal.


                          X-Files on the Net
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The X-Files division is shut down, and Mulder and Scully are
assigned to office duty. Scully spends her time discussing the finer
points of sputum cytology on sci.med.pathology.
Mulder spends his time browsing www.playboy.com.


                          X-Files star episode
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Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone Mulder and Scully are
replaced by the dynamic duo of Stallone and Schwarzenegger.  Trouble arises
when nobody understands what Stallone is saying, and Schwarzenegger disappears
in the men's room despite saying "I'll be back".


                            Nocturnal Sojurn
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X-files episode guest directed by Roman Polanski. Unlike other x-files
episodes, everyone dies in the end. David Hasselhoff plays himself.


                      The Scully horror picture show
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Scully reveals she is actually frankenfurter, a depraved alien who
fled to earth to conquer (among other things) the human race. She creates her
ultimate man, sings, and gets killed by an errant piece of toast.