The Secret Poetry of Ghandi
                           
                           by: Muthergoose &
                               Weir-me


                               VICTORY
                               -------
                          Red. Everywhere!
                        Blood, Death Violence,
                           Murder, Chaos!


                         PASSIVE PERSUASION
                         ------------------
                        Look at the flowers,
                         Look at the woman,
                     smelling their sweet aroma.
                        Now look at the woman
                      with my loin cloth wrapped
                           around her neck.


                                KATS
                                ----
                        I Kan't Kount the Kats.
                          They make me Krazy.
                         I Kan Kick the Kats
                        So they stop singing while
                               I sleep.


                            HINDU SCREAM
                            ------------
                  Have you ever heard a Hindu Scream, 
                       or a Muslim moan in fear?
                   Have you ever seen a Hindu puke,
                      after one too many beers?
                    Have you ever felt Hindu love,
                      a bald man's sweet caress?
                   Have you ever seen a little boy,
                        in my mother's dress?
                               I have.


                                HEAD
                                ----
                         My woman likes my 
                            bald head.
                   It goes well with my glasses.


                             THE WHISTLE
                             -----------
                        I like to gird my loins
                          in homespun cloth.
                   I like to play with goat cheese
                      until its warm and soft.
                           I like trains.
                             CHOO! CHOO!


                                COW
                                ---
                         I am the keeper of
                          the sacred cow.
                         My country wants
                      to turn my cow to beef.
                       Leave my lover alone!


                               ASRAM
                               -----
                     Why didn't you believe me?
                       "Don't make me angry."
                        Why didn't you see?
              "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."
                   I was telling you the truth.
                "I'll shoot! Don't come near me!"
               You only laughed. Why di you laugh?
         "I told you I'd shoot, why didn't you believe me?"