YAM I AM
                    By: Count B. and Dr.F.

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  The following text should be read on a street corner by a man wearing a 
                        a large yam costume.
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                            Yam I am
                            you say to me.
                            Ham I am
                            I say to thee.

                            To learn I cram
                            I must study.
                            For Spam I am
                            I say to thee.

                            I go to bed
                            In my jammy's.
                            For Yam I am
                            I've hurt my knee.

                            I've lived my life
                            I've payed my fee.
                            I use the restroom
                            When I have to urinate.

                            I spewed up
                            A can of Spam
                            It's stuck inside
                            Oh Goddamn!

                            "You are sick"
                            She says to me
                            But Yam I am
                            She fails to see.